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Aung San Suu Kyi: Good guy, bad guy or Burmese rhyming slang? YOUR GUIDE


Many of us are confused by Aung San flitting between winning a Nobel Prize and killing everyone.  Most people just stick with one (see: genocide & Trump). These are clearly … Continue reading

September 21, 2017 · Leave a comment

Britain’s homeless welcome the iPhone X


At a modest £1,149, the iPhone X is this year’s must have accessory for the destitute; alongside a dog, a copy of the Big Issue and the smell of wee. … Continue reading

September 20, 2017 · Leave a comment

London reels from another Trump tweet


A manhunt is underway for the individual who left an ‘unexploded piece of bullshit’ on social media.  Security services say that the makeshift tweet had all the hallmarks of a … Continue reading

September 19, 2017 · Leave a comment

North Korea still trying to hit cow with ‘banjo technology’


Scientists in Pyongyang have agreed that their wayward missile system, may be due to the fact they ‘couldn’t hit sand if they fell off a camel’.  Frustrated by their lack … Continue reading

September 18, 2017 · Leave a comment

Caption Competition: Breaking: Big Ben’s bong stolen, have you seen this man?


WINNER: Breaking: Big Ben’s bong stolen, have you seen this man? (from lacharpenta) RUNNERS UP I see that London’s public Boris Bicycle hire scheme is available to Brexiters, Remainers and … Continue reading

September 17, 2017 · 1 Comment

UK pledges £1bn to those Prime Ministers devastated by Hurricane Brexit


While Britain has scraped together a paltry £32m for damaged overseas territories in the wake of Hurricane Irma, the Government said it was still committed to funnelling hundreds of millions … Continue reading

September 14, 2017 · Leave a comment

Red Sox cheat using a Forever Friends elasticated watch


With the aid of a 1980’s Argos catalogue, the Boston Red Sox have been using a range of iconic watches to help their performance – not least of which was … Continue reading

September 13, 2017 · Leave a comment

Rees-Mogg opposed to contraception but ‘will cum on your tits’


The Tory backbencher and dyspeptic Harry Potter impersonator, has said that he is morally opposed to all forms of abortion; even in the event of the child becoming a Socialist. … Continue reading

September 12, 2017 · 4 Comments

‘Not just bin men refusing to touch festering rubbish’ say striking McDonald’s staff


While Birmingham has had to deal with seven-weeks of waste piling up due to industrial action, those living in the vicinity of striking McDonalds can take a break from their … Continue reading

September 11, 2017 · Leave a comment

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