The Truth about Goats
Despite his death, three years ago, the beloved comic actor is still the front runner to become the new Albanian Prime Minister. The nation has been impressed by his manifesto of trademark trips, cloth cap and fiscal responsibility. However some elements of the parliamentary election have been acrimoniously marred by allegations of vote-rigging by the capitalist Mr Grimsdale.
Prime Minister Sali Berisha is seeking a third term but has found himself losing ground to redoubtable, but very dead, Mr. Wisdom. The EU, which has twice rejected Albania’s membership, is said to be receptive to a renewed application provided the nation adopts “Don’t Laugh at Me (’cause I’m a Fool)” as their anthem. While the country’s electoral commission is in dispute, it is not yet clear if the main objection is setting a precedent in electing non-Albanian nationals or electing reanimated corpses.
International Monitors have expressed concern that the people of Albanian may be voting for Wisdom’s on-screen proletarian creation, Norman Pitkin, and not the deceased BAFTA-winning performer. One senior observer commented: “Increasingly in modern democracies, there is a blurring of the line between genuine candidates and fictitious buffoons. We call this the ‘Boris Johnson’ effect. Voters are inexplicably drawn towards affable clowns rather than their own Machiavellian politicians.
There have already been rumours circulating in Westminster that Labour’s Shadow Cabinet have enrolled in Mime School, in the hope of capitalizing on this voter confusion. This month UK Chancellor, George Osborne, decided to produce a series of balloon animals instead of the anticipated Budget. David Cameron has been seen sporting oversized shoes, a straw hat and a ridiculous “shit eating” grin while on holiday. And Nick Clegg has devoted most of his speeches to the practice of delivering and receiving a pie in the face.