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“Taliban says ‘sorry’ to England’s Primary Pupils”

Adnan Rasheed has sent a heart felt apology to school children throughout England, saying he wished Michael Gove “had never happened” to them.

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Schoolgirl Malala Yousafzai has also expressed shock that primary school pupils could be ranked directly against their peers across the country. She urged education for all, including “the sons and daughters of the Taliban” and all those in academies. She said that books and pens scared the Department for Education and Michael Gove clearly had an embolism anytime someone mentioned Media Studies.

Mr. Rasheed supported Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg’s use of human trafficking and oppression to women to help children to “achieve their potential”. However there were clear educational differences between the Taliban and the Coalition. “If Mr. Gove really did know his history,” reminded one terrorist. “he’d realise that the UK has invaded Afghanistan four times…and it never ends well.”

In his letter, the Pakistani Taliban leader made it clear that despite his love of bombs and guns, he would never unleash a Gove style curriculum on anyone. Mr Clegg dismissed fears: “We are not going to publish a name and shame league table” but he refused to rule out ritual stoning.

by @Wrenfoe

One comment on ““Taliban says ‘sorry’ to England’s Primary Pupils”

  1. Pingback: “Taliban says ‘sorry’ to England’s Primary Pupils” | Myles Musings

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