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‘Music fans want Hans Blix to tour ‘one last time”

Heavy Metal aficionados have joined an online campaign to tempt the once great ‘weapon’s inspector’ for a farewell gig in Syria. The Swedish diplomat is famed for such songs as ‘Love Bomb’, the gangster rap ‘WMD OMG’ and the haunting madrigal ‘You lying sack of sh*t, Mr Blair’.

Swedish diplomat and politician Hans Blix rela...

That flower looks suspiciously like a WMD (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Speculation is rife that the chemical attacks near Damascus are part of promotional campaign for a Blix ‘Come Back’ tour. His agent confirmed: ‘Iraq, Pakistan, Syria…where ever there are neurotoxins, plutonium or bodacious tunes – Hans will be there.’ Teenage fans, or ‘Blixers’ as they are known, have been frantically tweeting about the possible concert and supplementing their discussion with erotic drawings of Mr. Blix and Harry from 1D.

While most agree that a UN inspection team ‘without the B-myster’ will not be the same, Blix is not without his detractors. The Bush Administration was very critical of Blix’s ‘Iraqi Prog-Rock’ years and accused the Swede of taking ‘hallucinogens’. Ironically Blixers see that period as his most experimental yet creative, pointing towards tracks like ‘Colin Powell spells love, not Colon’, ‘You broke my heart but irradiated Chernobyl’ and the nine minute mix of natural harmonics and Rick Wakeman keyboards – ‘George. If you think they have WMD, you might want to check your ledger.’

by @Wrenfoe

8 comments on “‘Music fans want Hans Blix to tour ‘one last time”

  1. Riley Frost
    August 27, 2013

    Hahah this is brilliant. I posted something on this topic a while ago; baring in mind what you’ve written you may be interested. rileyfrost.wordpress.com/2013/08/26/what-are-the-concequences-of-military-intervention-in-syria/


    • Wrenfoe
      August 27, 2013

      Good piece but I’m disappointed you didn’t manage to get a reference to Harry from 1D in your article 🙂


  2. Mike Lince
    August 27, 2013

    I am a little at a loss with the musical references, but your story is still funny as hell! 🙂


  3. Wrenfoe
    August 27, 2013

    It’s true – I am the best online source for up to date One Direction info lol


  4. Pingback: New Mark Fiore animation on US Bush administration PR | Dear Kitty. Some blog

  5. Pingback: Experts: U.S. Case that Syrian Government Responsible for Chemical Weapons Is Weak — State of Globe

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This entry was posted on August 27, 2013 by in International Arts and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , .

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