Flibbertigibbet News

The Truth about Goats

‘Police prefer ‘bareback’ encounters’

Edinburgh’s saunas have had their licences revoked by a constabulary intent on ‘going rogue’. A spokesman for Supt. Matt Richards stressed that while Police Scotland did not advocate the banning … Continue reading

October 31, 2013 · 1 Comment

‘Bishop confuses ‘crib’ for ‘da crib”

The Vatican have suspended Franz-Peter Tebartz-van Elst amid fears that he has gone ‘gangsta’ on them. Parishioners attest to hearing the Bishop of Limburg using the ‘n’ word when referring … Continue reading

October 30, 2013 · Leave a comment

‘The word ‘gate’ is close to extinction’

Environmentalists have warned that due to over exploitation by the media, a rare but delicate pejorative suffix is soon to die out. The ‘lesser-spotted Gate’ once numbered in the millions … Continue reading

October 29, 2013 · 2 Comments

‘The source of Doner kebab meat is taken to the grave’

Kadir Nurman, inventor of the Doner, has died aged 80 but without revealing the secret ingredient behind his implausibly juicy meat. With his death, German police have been forced to … Continue reading

October 28, 2013 · Leave a comment

Flibbertigibbet Caption Competition: ‘A young Joanna Lumley poses happily with two members of the 3rd Queen Alexandra’s Gurkha Rifles in 1957’

‘A young Joanna Lumley poses happily with two members of the 3rd Queen Alexandra’s Gurkha Rifles in 1957’ (from Sozsatire) This month’s photo come courtesy of: bbc.com DATE: 26th Oct … Continue reading

October 27, 2013 · 3 Comments

‘Grangemouth workers not included as godparents to Prince George’

INEOS chairman, Jim Ratcliffe, has made it clear that unless the petrochemical workforce adopt reduced pensions, double-barrelled surnames and a taste for white truffles they will not be invited to … Continue reading

October 25, 2013 · Leave a comment

‘France coquettishly demands to be spied upon’

US diplomats have laughed off recent accusations of espionage as ‘the jealous machinations’ of a spurned French Republic. In turn, the Quai d’Orsay’s Laurent Fabius has petulantly claimed that the … Continue reading

October 24, 2013 · Leave a comment

‘US Scouts offer to topple Stonehenge’

Having already trashed a 170 million-year-old red rock from Goblin Valley State Park, Glenn Taylor plans to eradicate other ‘eyesores’ of the ancient world. First on the Scout Leader’s list … Continue reading

October 23, 2013 · Leave a comment

‘Nike ‘Fuelband’ to track British Gas profits’

Health fanatics and hypothermia sufferers were celebrating the launch of a new activity-tracking wristband, which guarantees to monitor fitness goals, frostbite and the gluttonous proceeds of energy suppliers. As prices … Continue reading

October 22, 2013 · Leave a comment

Reformation (play script)

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