The Truth about Goats
In a move that has surprised geologists, The Daily Mail has finally unearthed the nadir of political journalism. Having rigorously mined the depths of inaccuracy, the tabloid was said to be delighted to have sullied the reputation of Ed Miliband’s deceased father and gatecrashed a memorial service to his Uncle.
If anything, the paper hopes now that they have hit ‘bottom’ to keep digging. Despite Ed Miliband being the easiest target since the Hindenburg, one Mail editor insisted: ‘Ralph Miliband is arguably the most evil person – EVER. Period. We’ve got a series of crayon graphs to prove it. He described himself as a ‘writer, teacher and socialist’ which as we know is code for ‘paedophile’. He even had the gall to fight against our beloved Hitler. Now THERE was a man who understood the need for strict immigration laws’.
When not paying damages to Tamil hunger strikers, slandering the dead in a homophobic fashion or winning the 2011 ‘Orwellian Prize for Journalistic Misrepresentation’, the ‘newspaper’ likes nothing more than to be simultaneously erroneous and mean spirited. Journalist Geoffrey Levy has promised in the name of ‘balance’ to follow with a series of exposes; ‘Why Ed’s kids will steal your car’, ‘How Ed’s wife is not as hot as Samantha Brick’ and ‘The Miliband cat self-rims’.