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ITV to replace Coronation Street with Silk Road


The nation’s favourite court venue is soon to be eclipsed by a fresher, more illicit, state-side soap opera. By swapping Weatherfield for sunny California, TV executives are hoping to rejuvenate mid-week viewing figures with a heady mix of narcotics trafficking, social networking and oblique references to the movie ‘The Princess Bride’.

Next week's storyline involves the cornershop being shortchanged with bitcoins

Next week’s storyline involves the cornershop being shortchanged with bitcoins

While the cast of Coronation Street have worked hard to establish a monopoly on sexual impropriety, ITV producers have felt that the format of real life ‘grubby scandals’ has become somewhat jaded. In order to target a younger demographic, the American show will offer 13,000 alternate storylines of potential drug abuse, forgery and hacking. What is unclear at this stage, is whether the Mancunian accent will retained; as ‘L.A. Gangstas dissing hoes’ sound rather incongruous when saying ‘Aa right pal, d’yer see that minger down the Rovers?’.

Have brokered $1bn in transactions, Silk Road is likely to have a significantly larger budget which will allow the Rovers Return to be transformed into an exclusive nightclub. Coronation Street’s clichéd portrayal of the urban working class will be replaced with contract killing, nefarious bitcoin exchanges and Gail McIntyre/Potter/Tilsley/Platt/Hillman possibly getting remarried. Ross William Ulbricht, the alleged ‘mastermind’ behind the new format, has promised less emphasis on laundrettes and more focus on actual money laundering.

by @Wrenfoe

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This entry was posted on February 13, 2014 by in UK Entertainment and tagged , , , , , , , .

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