Flibbertigibbet News

The Truth about Goats

Last known Lib Dem dies in captivity

Zoo keepers, veterinarians and ‘sandal-wearing libertarians’ were left mourning the loss of the world’s last remaining ‘Greater-spectacled Oakeshott’. The ‘Oakeshott’ had been cared for in the House of Lords’ wildlife refuge since May 2000, but had failed to find a left-wing breeding partner among the elderly peers. One scientist described him as a ‘beautiful specimen…with a lovely side parting, chip on his shoulder and a fetish for a penny on income tax’.


Liberals - Doomed to extinction

Liberals – Doomed to extinction

Other Lib Dems had survived in the wild by cross-breeding with Conservatives, but their abominable offspring were deemed ‘too unsightly’ by the electorate and were soon culled in the European elections. Meanwhile the ‘Oakeshott’ was forced to hide in ‘the long grass’ and eat political scraps for fear some Tory beast might pounce. Unfortunately, in his weakened state, the toothless ‘Oakeshott’ was unable to fend off an assault by a small, tenacious rodent – known as the ‘Yellow-bellied Clegg’.


Zoo scientists will now turn their energies to the rapidly deteriorating ‘Lesser-spotted klutz’ or ‘Dozy Miliband’ as it is often referred to. Likened to the giant panda for his lack of self-preservation, the ‘Dozy Miliband’, is infamous for his high-pitched nasal twang, eating his siblings and trying to mate with any member of the electorate ‘with a pulse’.


Currently Westminster is fearful of being over-run by a plague of UKIP councilors or ‘Kippers’. These ‘Kippers’ will burrow into any constituency, nesting in torn up strips of the Daily Mail and happily surviving on a diet of their leader’s own excrement. Sadly the remains of ‘Oakeshott’ will be stuffed and put on display at party headquarters, in Great George Street, next to the pickled remains of Charles Kennedy.





Give Wrenfoe a piece of your mind

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.


This entry was posted on June 6, 2014 by in UK Politics and tagged , , , , , , , , , .

Reformation (play script)

Prize Winners

Our readers described Flibbertigibbet News as ..."only slightly less accurate than the Daily Mail"(Dizzychick84) ..."clearly under-appreciated" (Sean Smithson)..."Half man, half goat. All Comedy"(JizzOSmith)..."the best reason for smirking at work" (DavidHollands) and ..."clearly an elaborate internet phishing scam!"(XangChek12)

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive FREE notifications of new posts by email.

Join 9,617 other followers

Blog Stats

  • 42,666 fumbles

Follow Wrenfoe on Twitter


Award Winning

Reader Review

"It takes a sick and yet highly evolved mind to fully grasp the sophistication of your humor. I tried to explain this to my wife, who thought I was having convulsions as I lay on the floor laughing." (Mike Lince)

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2018

Flib Zealots

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2014

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2013

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2015

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2016

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2017

%d bloggers like this: