Flibbertigibbet News

The Truth about Goats

Brooks to recreate Houdini’s routine

By popular demand, editor Rebekah Brooks will be visiting local theatres to amaze the public with her death-defying illusions, borderline perjury and concealed ‘get out of jail free’ card. With a routine that would put Dynamo to shame Brooks, a renowned escape artist, will tap dance of the head of a needle, while deleting a hard drive and only suspended from the ceiling by the disbelief of the Crown Prosecution Service.

All News of the World journalists should follow the signs

All News of the World journalists should follow the signs

Like Harry Houdini, Brook intends to a tour of Europe, challenging police forces to keep her locked up. However with the aid of smoke, mirrors and the ‘best legal team Mr Murdoch can buy’ she will free herself from any chains, straitjacket or suggestion that she is ‘mates with David Cameron’. A spokesman confirmed: ‘Sadly, and contrary to rumour, Mrs. Books will not be ably assisted by the lovely Andy Coulson. As Andy will now only be focusing on his on escape routine – a simple tunnelling extravaganza staged from within one of Her Majesty’s finest prisons’.

Some journalists have suggested she keeps spare skeleton keys and naked photographs of high court judges secreted about her person, to aid with her evasion. Yet, Brooks armed with no more than the ‘I know nothing, I am from Barcelona’ defence has befuddled juries with her ginger tendrils, managerial incompetence and promise of free Sky Sports. Brooks now ranks alongside some of great escape artists of the last century – including David Blaine, the occupants of Colditz and Mr. O.J. Simpson.

Ultimately Mrs. Brooks is hoping to give her name to a disclosure scheme called ‘Rebekah’s Law’. This ‘law’ will enable future residents of Chipping Norton to formally ask the police if they are living within a ten mile radius of someone who spreads hate, despair and misinformation through illicit journalism or if it is just Jeremy Clarkson writing for The Sun.


by @Wrenfoe


Give Wrenfoe a piece of your mind

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.


This entry was posted on June 25, 2014 by in UK Crime and tagged , , , , , , .

Reformation (play script)

Prize Winners

Our readers described Flibbertigibbet News as ..."only slightly less accurate than the Daily Mail"(Dizzychick84) ..."clearly under-appreciated" (Sean Smithson)..."Half man, half goat. All Comedy"(JizzOSmith)..."the best reason for smirking at work" (DavidHollands) and ..."clearly an elaborate internet phishing scam!"(XangChek12)

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive FREE notifications of new posts by email.

Join 9,435 other followers

Blog Stats

  • 43,962 fumbles

Follow Wrenfoe on Twitter


Award Winning

Reader Review

"It takes a sick and yet highly evolved mind to fully grasp the sophistication of your humor. I tried to explain this to my wife, who thought I was having convulsions as I lay on the floor laughing." (Mike Lince)

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2018

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2019

Flib Zealots

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2014

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2013

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2015

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2016

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2017

%d bloggers like this: