Flibbertigibbet News

The Truth about Goats

Dublin narrowly escapes Garth Brooks’ concert

In what is being described as a ‘near death experience’ (NDE), the people of Ireland have fortuitously avoided coming into contact with an over-sized Stetson, painful guitar twangs and an ego the size of Nashville. Garth Brooks’ five shows at Croke Park have all been cancelled amid a national call for an end to tucking your jeans inside your cowboy boots, wrapping a bald eagle inside a confederate flag and Garth’s love of all things Wallmart.

Yup, things are hotting up now

Yup, things are hotting up now

Not since St. Patrick banished all snakes from Ireland, has there been such a popular expulsion. When asked why so many Irish had purchased tickets for the Brooks’ gig in the first place, one concert goer explained: ‘You see it was all part of an elaborate ruse. You have to tempt little baldy fella out of his nest. He thinks he’s going to have a whale of a time and then BAM! Things suddenly go arseways on him. You should see the look on his fat face. It’s all about the craic, you know?’

One NDE survivor described what it was like to see Brooks in the 90s: “Initially I felt a detachment from my body…as if I was floating towards the light. That blinding light was suddenly blocked by a big fat head coming into view. Any feeling of serenity was cut short by some warbling nonsense about papa loving mama. Eventually the bland melodies just washed over me until I was pronounced clinically dead…or ‘asleep’ in layman’s terms’.

Despite purchasing over 128 million CDs in the hope Brooks would stay retired in 2001, people have had to come to terms with the fact that irrepressible country singer may have returned – like herpes. One Dublin City Council official said: ‘You have to remember that Garth Brooks is a gateway artist for the likes of Billy Ray Cyrus. And once you let Cyrus in, then you’ve got twerking all over the city. Don’t forget – line dancing is the only kind of dancing that makes River Dance look funky.’

by @Wrenfoe



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


This entry was posted on July 17, 2014 by in International Arts and tagged , , , , , , , .

Reformation (play script)

Prize Winners

Our readers described Flibbertigibbet News as ..."only slightly less accurate than the Daily Mail"(Dizzychick84) ..."clearly under-appreciated" (Sean Smithson)..."Half man, half goat. All Comedy"(JizzOSmith)..."the best reason for smirking at work" (DavidHollands) and ..."clearly an elaborate internet phishing scam!"(XangChek12)

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive FREE notifications of new posts by email.

Join 570 other followers

Blog Stats

  • 37,691 fumbles

Follow Wrenfoe on Twitter


Award Winning

Reader Review

"It takes a sick and yet highly evolved mind to fully grasp the sophistication of your humor. I tried to explain this to my wife, who thought I was having convulsions as I lay on the floor laughing." (Mike Lince)

Flib Zealots

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2014

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2013

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2015

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2016

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2017

%d bloggers like this: