Flibbertigibbet News

The Truth about Goats

Drone strike hits Cameron as he claims to be a ‘friend’ of Afghanistan

The UK Prime Minister was forced to dig himself and the new Afghan President, Ashraf Ghani, out from under a pile rubble – left by the impact of a surgical drone strike. Unbeknownst to Mr. Cameron, articulating the words ‘strong partner to Afghanistan’ is a trigger phrase to the unmanned weapons systems deployed throughout the region. What should have been an ordinary diplomatic visit, ended in the burning remains of a podium, both men unceremoniously covered in dust and the waste of a missile, which could better be aimed at a local school.

Just before the drone struck...

Just before the drone struck…

As yet, no country has claimed responsibility for the strike; but having recently ordered the deaths of over 2,400 people in Pakistan, the US is looking ‘…somewhat sheepish’. A Pentagon official said: ‘There is no direct evidence linking the attack on Mr. Cameron and our own kill list. But – if I were him, if I was in Kabul – I’d probably not shake hands with anyone with a beard – at least not in the open’.

With negligible legislation covering the deployment of armed drones, merely standing at a Pakistani  wedding ‘looking a bit shifty’ is motivation enough to unleash extrajudicial murder. While Mr Ghani said British troops had stood ‘shoulder to shoulder’ with Afghanistan, he now suggested that they might want to stand ‘a little further back’ if they were going to keep talking about friendship within drone range.

Britain’s own Watchkeeper surveillance drone fleet is worth £850m, as a MoD spokesman explained: ‘Yes, British and US troops are set to leave Afghanistan, but that does not mean we have to stop raining down aerial death on anyone we fancy’. Mr. Cameron’s own advisors were bullish about situation: ‘So – he made an error standing next to an Afghani and calling him friend – what? These mistakes happen. The drone was not in error, the mistake was not sending the Foreign Secretary, Philip Hammond, to stand here instead’.

by @Wrenfoe

Give Wrenfoe a piece of your mind

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.


This entry was posted on October 17, 2014 by in UK Defence and tagged , , , , , , , , .

Reformation (play script)

Prize Winners

Our readers described Flibbertigibbet News as ..."only slightly less accurate than the Daily Mail"(Dizzychick84) ..."clearly under-appreciated" (Sean Smithson)..."Half man, half goat. All Comedy"(JizzOSmith)..."the best reason for smirking at work" (DavidHollands) and ..."clearly an elaborate internet phishing scam!"(XangChek12)

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive FREE notifications of new posts by email.

Join 9,448 other followers

Blog Stats

  • 44,857 fumbles

Follow Wrenfoe on Twitter


Award Winning

Reader Review

"It takes a sick and yet highly evolved mind to fully grasp the sophistication of your humor. I tried to explain this to my wife, who thought I was having convulsions as I lay on the floor laughing." (Mike Lince)

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2018

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2019

Flib Zealots

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2014

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2013

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2015

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2016

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2017

%d bloggers like this: