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The Truth about Goats

Bill Cosby more ‘threatening’ than your average Sommelier

Despite rigorous denials of any wrong-doing, lawyers for Mr. Cosby have been forced to concede that he invariably mixed red wine with fish, over-poured champagne and mistook Rohypnol for a … Continue reading

July 30, 2015 · Leave a comment

Alan Sugar ‘intake’ should be halved

Scientists have recommended cutting our media exposure to millionaires with their own reality TV show and love affair with an under-performing football team. Advisers on nutrition say that by exceeding … Continue reading

July 29, 2015 · Leave a comment

‘Crazy discounts’ blamed for shortage of ‘mental beds’

With up to 60% off and 4 years interest free credit, the ‘insanity’ that is home furnishing flash-sales has led to a lack adult psychiatric health provision. One excitable marketing … Continue reading

July 28, 2015 · Leave a comment

Greek credit rating identified as new pentaquark particle

Scientists at the Large Hadron Collider (LHCb) have announced the discovery of one the smallest forms of matter, that of Prime Minister Alexis Tsipras’ savings account. Having already transformed into … Continue reading

July 27, 2015 · Leave a comment

Caption Competition: ‘Choir boys in swimwear? Where?!?’

WINNER: ‘Choir boys in swimwear? Where?!?’ (from SulkyMulk)   This month’s photo come courtesy of: bbc.com DATE: 25th July 2015 RUNNERS UP: ‘A little more leg, Frankie. Pout, pout, pout, … Continue reading

July 26, 2015 · 2 Comments

Mexico offers $3.8m reward for ‘man-eating mole’

Officials at Altiplano jail have instigated a nationwide alert for mutant creature with ‘burrowing ability’, who has inadvertently created a subterranean passageway between their high security shower area and nearby … Continue reading

July 23, 2015 · Leave a comment

Worst fears confirmed: God is a lefty

In gifting Pope Francis a hammer and sickle-shaped crucifix, Bolivian President Evo Morales proved once and for all that the divine being is just as much a ‘hippy’ as his … Continue reading

July 22, 2015 · Leave a comment

House of Commons identified as a brownfield site

As part of Chancellor George Osborne’s policy to liberate planning permissions, several of London’s most dilapidated eyesores have been scheduled for demolition. Rather than face a repair bill of £5.7bn, … Continue reading

July 21, 2015 · Leave a comment

Keith Richards may have taken performance enhancing drugs‏

The worlds of athletics and music have been thrown into confusion with the allegation that The Rolling Stones’ guitarist may have used ban substances. Inducted in 2008 into Musicians’ Hall … Continue reading

July 20, 2015 · 2 Comments

Reformation (play script)

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