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Met Office to be replaced by giant Pine Cone


The BBC will no longer depend on the Met Office for its weather reports and will now use more reliable methods, such as ‘chicken entrails’. Instead of some expensive guff … Continue reading

September 30, 2015 · Leave a comment

Sperm Bank ‘crash’ more of a squelch


On what financial analysts are calling ‘White Tuesday’, the UK national sperm bank was forced to admit to a massive loss of savings and that the content of their vault … Continue reading

September 29, 2015 · Leave a comment

Lack of snakebite antidote a worry for Katie Hopkin’s fans


Medicins Sans Frontieres have warned that stocks of ‘Hopkins anti-venom’ are running dangerously low and that the public should be on their guard for a carnivorous reptile ‘hiding in the … Continue reading

September 28, 2015 · Leave a comment

Caption Competition: ‘Elton …I’m reeeady!’


WINNER: ‘Elton …I’m reeeady!’ (from Al O’Pecia) This month’s photo come courtesy of: bbc.com DATE: 26th Sept 2015 RUNNERS UP: ‘Seconds later Putin was ripped apart…a bit like Ukraine’ (from … Continue reading

September 27, 2015 · 2 Comments

SNP to replace daylight savings with ‘borrowed time‏’


Scotland’s First Minister has rejected David Cameron’s insistence on a shared British clock and has proposed a move to a system where by the Scots, under cover of darkness, could … Continue reading

September 24, 2015 · Leave a comment

Chuka Umunna to quit showering in the morning


The ex-shadow business secretary has declared his intention to step down from front-line hygiene control and to focus more time on trying to ‘stay in his pyjamas’. Having withdrawn from … Continue reading

September 23, 2015 · Leave a comment

We love migrants – shock


Politicians and giddy school girls alike have stormed the internet in search for tips on how to copy the latest fashion sensation – ‘Refugee Chic’.  Anyone who is anyone is … Continue reading

September 22, 2015 · 2 Comments

Rooney equals Charlton’s record on stupid hair cuts


Much to the delight of San Marino fans, Wayne Rooney put on a vintage display of ball skills and ‘comb-overs’ during their Euro 2016 qualifier.  The England captain has now … Continue reading

September 21, 2015 · Leave a comment

Caption Competition: ‘Athletics in shock as Bolt attacked by a MoBot’


WINNER: ‘Athletics in shock as Bolt attacked by a MoBot’ (from Al O’Pecia)) This month’s photo come courtesy of: bbc.com DATE: 20th Sept 2015 RUNNERS UP: ‘Calls for reversing cameras … Continue reading

September 20, 2015 · 2 Comments

Reformation (play script)

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