Flibbertigibbet News

The Truth about Goats

Female libido pill to replace Harry Styles


Sprout Pharmaceuticals have released a new drug, Flibanserin, guaranteed to have the same impact on the female sex drive as ‘sitting on Russell Brand’s knee’. No longer will women have to resort to One Direction fantasies to support arousal, as the pill with give them the same hormonal levels of a ’70’s Light Entertainer’.

Styles in a box

Styles in a box

Flibanserin, marketed in the US by Addyi, is competitively priced to match the leading libido brand, of a bar of chocolate and a nice white wine. One doctor explained: ‘Too long have we had a heavy reliance on the psychological stimulus – or in layman’s terms – the Wank Bank. This drug will also allow married woman to move away from conventional tools such as putting a bag over your partner’s head, asking them to shower or leaning on the washing machine’.
A spokesman for Sprout said: ‘Ironically increasing male sexual thoughts simply involves keeping the patient awake, but with women things are more complex. Fortunately lab experiments where white rats were given a dose of Flibanserin, caused the test subject to act like a school boy with a stash of Jennifer Lawrence selfies’.
However, some are intimidated by intimacy engineering; one male said: ‘It’s all very well creating a generation of horny ladies but where will they go? Do we really want the streets to look like Newcastle on a Friday night? If my girlfriend resolves her low sex-drive and low self-esteem, how will I convince her to marry me?’

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Information

This entry was posted on September 1, 2015 by in International Health and tagged , , , , , .

Prize Winners

Our readers described Flibbertigibbet News as ..."only slightly less accurate than the Daily Mail"(Dizzychick84) ..."clearly under-appreciated" (Sean Smithson)..."Half man, half goat. All Comedy"(JizzOSmith)..."the best reason for smirking at work" (DavidHollands) and ..."clearly an elaborate internet phishing scam!"(XangChek12)

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive FREE notifications of new posts by email.

Join 550 other followers

Blog Stats

  • 35,309 fumbles

Follow Wrenfoe on Twitter

By

Award Winning

Reader Review

"It takes a sick and yet highly evolved mind to fully grasp the sophistication of your humor. I tried to explain this to my wife, who thought I was having convulsions as I lay on the floor laughing." (Mike Lince)

Flib Zealots

Reformation (play script)

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2014

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2013

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2015

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2016

%d bloggers like this: