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American heroes criticised for ‘lack of guns’


US citizens Anthony Sadler and Alek Skarlatos brought shame to their nation, by employing unarmed techniques to foil a terror plot. In a blatant disregard for their beloved Second Amendment, the two traitorous rail passengers ‘fought like girls’ slapping, scratching and ‘choking a maniac with a handgun to unconsciousness’.

Never leave home without one

Never leave home without one

An NRA spokesmen complained: ‘Quite frankly using your hands against someone wielding an AK-47 assault rifle, is the coward’s way. It’s utterly disproportionate. What next? Words to disarm nuclear states? Don’t get me started about John Kerry.’

Worse still, some ‘limey’ (a Mr. Chris Norman) was seen assisting the two men. A spokesman for President Obama said: ‘It’s bad enough having to bail the French out of two World Wars; but it just makes it so less impressive with the UK in tow. The Brits are all false modesty, bad teeth and a sense of cultural superiority. And the French can do that fine without any help’.

The NRA has made it clear that to stop future unarmed atrocities, terrorists need to arm themselves better. Meanwhile both men are set to be stripped of their nationality. Henceforth they will be forced into self-depreciating humour, a cautious attitude to guns and sympathy for the French; or Canadian citizenship as it is called.

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2 comments on “American heroes criticised for ‘lack of guns’

  1. Caps lock
    December 30, 2015

    STARZ! Or lack of.

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This entry was posted on September 4, 2015 by in International Crime and tagged , , , , .

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