The Truth about Goats
Outrage gripped the nation as the proud legacy left by Britain’s greatest wartime leader was wilfully ignored by Imam, Jeremy Corbyn. Lamentation was heard as the so-called Leader of the Opposition seemed to forget the pride Tony Blair had given the UK through his successful military intervention in Iraq; which brought stability, happiness and ‘all the shrapnel you can eat’ to the region.
Heckles resounded throughout the House of Commons, as Corbyn stubbornly refused to follow David Cameron along Mr. Blair’s well-trodden ‘path to peace’ – historically known as ‘another aimless war in the Middle East’. A member of the Shadow Cabinet complained: ‘Jeremy seemed unaware of the statues to Mr. Blair on every street corner or that Tony was completely exonerated by the Chilcot Inquiry and that Afghan villagers regularly sing his name’.
A Whitehall spokeswoman said: ‘Mr. Cameron is never wrong. You only have to look at how the private sector has helped the NHS, the honesty of our bankers and the strength of our steel industry. Time and again, he takes advice from the right people; like Andy Coulson, Lord Ashcroft or Emperor Palpatine’.
The spokeswoman denied that Prime Ministers sometimes seek war for spurious or self-serving reasons: ‘Mr. Corbyn should do a bit more to honour our dead soldiers than worrying about the live ones. The PM has identified 70.000 Syrian warriors ready to flock to our cause. And he hasn’t been distracted by the fact that every international expert says these are fictitious numbers. I can assure you they are as real as Weapons of Mass Destruction’