Flibbertigibbet News

The Truth about Goats

Ministers to be able to ‘wear jeans’ during EU vote

In the spirit of open government and the ‘last day of term’, the Prime Minister has decided to allow his Cabinet a free vote on any EU referendum and the chance to bring in ‘a toy of their choice’ from home. Mr. Cameron hoped his laissez faire attitude to democracy would permit his fellow Tories to find their ‘inner-sceptic’, while at the same time allowing them to ‘beat their own drum’ rather than beat-off the person they are next to.

Mr. Cameron's vision

Mr. Cameron’s vision

Cupping a single rose in hands, Mr. Cameron addressed a packed room of journalists while sitting in the lotus position. He highlighted the economic implications of an EU withdrawal and explained that ‘life is just a journey’ and asked ‘why can’t we all just get along?’. He explained that withdrawing the party whip was always his intention and that messy hair is ‘totally his thing’.
A tie-dyed spokesman said: ‘Don’t call him Mr. Cameron, it’s Dave. Just Dave. And just Dave doesn’t want his Ministers to conform to social norms. Feel Mother Earth. Touch your chi. Breathe in. Experience Dave’s vibrations. Breathe out. And…I’m just suggesting…if some of you want to experiment…say…physically, then Dave’s not going to look a gift pig in the mouth’.
Mr. Cameron then attempted to clear the room of any ‘negative energy’ by offering to massage perineums with his home-made scented lavender oil. Contemplating a dew drop upon the petals in front of him, the Prime Minister clarified that border controls were ‘a state of mind’, a single European currency is ‘a rainbow’ and that Nigel Farage needs to experience tantric sex with a dolphin.


Give Wrenfoe a piece of your mind

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.


This entry was posted on February 1, 2016 by in UK Politics and tagged , , , , , , , .

Reformation (play script)

Prize Winners

Our readers described Flibbertigibbet News as ..."only slightly less accurate than the Daily Mail"(Dizzychick84) ..."clearly under-appreciated" (Sean Smithson)..."Half man, half goat. All Comedy"(JizzOSmith)..."the best reason for smirking at work" (DavidHollands) and ..."clearly an elaborate internet phishing scam!"(XangChek12)

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive FREE notifications of new posts by email.

Join 9,617 other followers

Blog Stats

  • 42,662 fumbles

Follow Wrenfoe on Twitter


Award Winning

Reader Review

"It takes a sick and yet highly evolved mind to fully grasp the sophistication of your humor. I tried to explain this to my wife, who thought I was having convulsions as I lay on the floor laughing." (Mike Lince)

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2018

Flib Zealots

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2014

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2013

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2015

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2016

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2017

%d bloggers like this: