Flibbertigibbet News

The Truth about Goats

Call for ministers to offer 24/7 dumb-fuckery


While legitimate concerns have been raised about NHS weekend provision, many are now demanding that the Cabinet spreads its incompetence more evenly over the week.  Data suggests a sharp decline in moronic decisions from Saturday to Sunday, leading to unsustainable levels of happiness throughout the nation and the accusation that the Government are ‘part-time f@ckwits’.

So dumb it hurts

So dumb it hurts

Those in need of dozy governance on weekends have often been forced to look for imbecilic private contractors to fill the gap; such as G4S or the Chuckle Brothers.  This is despite MPs having taken the Hypocritical Oath ‘to do no discernible good’; which is followed by induction training in embezzlement, perversion and lethargy.

One concerned voter demanded more purveyors of the asinine: ‘To be half-baked is a full-time pursuit.  Too many people are surviving the weekend without ministerial mishaps, which is unacceptable when David Cameron has a Cabinet packed with dullards.  Constituents should expect round the clock failure or at very least a Boris Johnson bed-bath’.

Jeremy Hunt, particularly, has drawn stinging criticism for only providing partial stupidity and of delegating serious moments of ineptitude to junior officials or a faeces-hurling chimp, called Gove.  While privately, friends of the Secretary of State attest to him only being ‘a tw@t on weekdays.’

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Information

This entry was posted on May 4, 2016 by in UK Politics and tagged , , , , , , , , .

Prize Winners

Our readers described Flibbertigibbet News as ..."only slightly less accurate than the Daily Mail"(Dizzychick84) ..."clearly under-appreciated" (Sean Smithson)..."Half man, half goat. All Comedy"(JizzOSmith)..."the best reason for smirking at work" (DavidHollands) and ..."clearly an elaborate internet phishing scam!"(XangChek12)

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive FREE notifications of new posts by email.

Join 557 other followers

Blog Stats

  • 36,328 fumbles

Follow Wrenfoe on Twitter

By

Award Winning

Reader Review

"It takes a sick and yet highly evolved mind to fully grasp the sophistication of your humor. I tried to explain this to my wife, who thought I was having convulsions as I lay on the floor laughing." (Mike Lince)

Flib Zealots

Reformation (play script)

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2014

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2013

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2015

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2016

%d bloggers like this: