Flibbertigibbet News

The Truth about Goats

‘City of Culture’ mainly ironic


Eleven cities are bidding to become 2021’s pub quiz answer that must be followed by the statement ‘Really? That sh$t-hole?’.  For many of the applicants, their only experience of growing culture involves something infectious in a petri dish.

The delusional list includes Perth, Paisley, Stoke, Sunderland, Coventry, Hereford Warrington, Portsmouth, Wells, Swansea, St Davids – all of which feature in Dante’s ‘Inferno’.  For most the loose definition of ‘cultural heritage’ extends to still having a segregated water-fountain, a plague pit and a Gregg’s from the 1970’s.

In anticipation, blue plaques have started to spring up everywhere, each claiming to be the original site of the ‘canal prostitute murders’.  The Heritage Lottery Fund will provide £3m to the winning city – which is often described as ‘hush money’ –  but will allow the city to purchase its own themed miniature golf and massage parlor.

Since winning the title in 2013, Hull has seen a £1bn investment and in return, the city has renovated three allotments, added two new cycle lanes and a petting zoo for hamsters. Hull is now ranked as one of the seven great ‘wonder whys’ of the world, becoming and a hub of tourist attraction and morbid curiosity.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Information

This entry was posted on March 22, 2017 by in UK Lifestyle and tagged , , , , , .

Prize Winners

Our readers described Flibbertigibbet News as ..."only slightly less accurate than the Daily Mail"(Dizzychick84) ..."clearly under-appreciated" (Sean Smithson)..."Half man, half goat. All Comedy"(JizzOSmith)..."the best reason for smirking at work" (DavidHollands) and ..."clearly an elaborate internet phishing scam!"(XangChek12)

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive FREE notifications of new posts by email.

Join 537 other followers

Blog Stats

  • 32,994 fumbles

Follow Wrenfoe on Twitter

By

Award Winning

Reader Review

"It takes a sick and yet highly evolved mind to fully grasp the sophistication of your humor. I tried to explain this to my wife, who thought I was having convulsions as I lay on the floor laughing." (Mike Lince)

Flib Zealots

Reformation (play script)

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2014

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2013

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2015

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2016

%d bloggers like this: