The Truth about Goats
Following the Grenfell Tower fire, over 600 UK buildings have been labelled dangerously unfit to house cockroaches, let alone a family of pigs. Normally the Big Bad Wolf would fully support a straw or stick based construction, but even he felt that tenement cladding was making ginger bread cottages look solid.
Mr. B.B.Wolf commented: ‘As a menacing predatory antagonist I can appreciate the efforts of Kensington Council but there’s such a thing as too evil. The only fairy story here, is the illusion of fire safety. It just seems that every tale I hear is literally Grimm’.
Fire inspectors have said that promises made by private contractors would have made Pinocchio blush. Meanwhile Theresa May have promised emergency funds for those affected – essentially a hill of magic beans.
Mr. Wolf said: ‘Normally I’d suggest a temporary housing solution – maybe involving Grandma’s cottage, but that was already seized to pay for her dementia tax. Oh, and if you are in the area, avoid huffing and puffing – just in case they’ve used asbestos’.