Flibbertigibbet News

The Truth about Goats

National Trust celebrates ‘Heterosexual Shame Weekend’

With some volunteers uncomfortable supporting LGBTQ rights, The National Trust has decided instead to memorialize smutty beachside postcards, grey socks and unimaginative sexual positions.  The ‘Heterosexual Shame Weekend’ will see a march of boring copulators accompanied by bland music, conformist haircuts and an overwhelming sense of ennui.

Standing under a statue of the missionary position, one National Trust volunteer explained: ‘Instead of marking the 50th anniversary of homosexuality being decriminalised, we’ve decided to celebrate the 2,000th year of falling asleep during sex.  We’ve also got a virtual reality display of heterosexuality – featuring the remains of Mary Whitehouse, a tartan thermos flask and a drunken Mel Gibson’.

Complaining about LGBTQ campaigns, Tory MP Andrew Bridgen said this is virtue signalling ‘gone mad’; while Ukip MEP Gerard Batten said this is politically correct nonsense ‘gone mad’; yet elderly lesbian Janet Wilsby described both men as uptight heterosexuals – with all the open mindedness of Robert Mugabe on Grindr – ‘gone bad’.

Volunteers at Felbrigg Hall in Norfolk have agreed to wear magnolia-coloured badges and help a sassy gay friend to stop watching RuPaul’s Drag Race.  Instead, everyone will be lionizing the benefits of being ‘straight’; which include a phobia of glitter, reading Leviticus and a higher divorce rate.


Give Wrenfoe a piece of your mind

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.


This entry was posted on August 8, 2017 by in UK Lifestyle and tagged , , , , , , .

Reformation (play script)

Prize Winners

Our readers described Flibbertigibbet News as ..."only slightly less accurate than the Daily Mail"(Dizzychick84) ..."clearly under-appreciated" (Sean Smithson)..."Half man, half goat. All Comedy"(JizzOSmith)..."the best reason for smirking at work" (DavidHollands) and ..."clearly an elaborate internet phishing scam!"(XangChek12)

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive FREE notifications of new posts by email.

Join 585 other followers

Blog Stats

  • 38,657 fumbles

Follow Wrenfoe on Twitter


Award Winning

Reader Review

"It takes a sick and yet highly evolved mind to fully grasp the sophistication of your humor. I tried to explain this to my wife, who thought I was having convulsions as I lay on the floor laughing." (Mike Lince)

Flib Zealots

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2014

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2013

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2015

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2016

Flibbertigibbet Annual 2017

%d bloggers like this: