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‘If only I’d thought to use a wheelchair’ Weinstein tells George Bush Snr


Having apologised for sexual assault, the former President has been applauded for the dignified and statesmen-like manner with which he goosed an actress.  In this tawdry age of Harvey Weinstein, it is gratifying to know that George Bush Snr. still knows how to treat a young lady – with respect and a dirty joke – yet not to sully an innocent buttock grab, with a vulgar movie deal.

As experts will attest, there is a sweet spot for being a vilified sex offender.  Early 20s is far too young.  Eighty-plus is too implausible, but 40-70 is in the ‘pervert zone’.  Old enough to know better, but still mobile.  At 93, the wheelchair-bound, ex-President could easily be fended off by a stern word or by the use of stairs.

No longer covered by Presidential immunity, George Bush Snr. has been forced to apply for ‘dirty, old bastard’ amnesty.  Explained a legal spokesman: ‘It’s like being a Nazi Commandant.  Yes, you’re abhorrent at the time, but as the years tick by, there comes a point where you look like Santa. And who wouldn’t want to sit on Santa’s knee…while he gropes you’.

The elderly rogue, reminded voters that there was a more reserved style of Presidency than Clinton or Trump, with many fans surprised he ‘still had it in him’.  Said his spokesman: ‘Please remember that President Bush suffers from a form of Parkinson’s disease. Cecil Parkinson that is’.

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This entry was posted on October 30, 2017 by in International Lifestyle and tagged , , , , , .

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