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The Truth about Goats

Fall in child marriages attributed Jerry Lee Lewis ‘slowing down’

At 82 years of age, the American singer-songwriter, has admitted that he is no longer able to offer the same levels of inappropriate romance and rock’n’roll grooming.  Unicef estimates that … Continue reading

March 19, 2018 · Leave a comment

Caption Competition: They call him the underdog.

WINNER: They call him the underdog. (from@MalcolmRexFairy) RUNNERS UP The North Korean Police confident they can stop defectors as they proudly demonstrate some of their new Levitating Border Patrol dogs. … Continue reading

March 18, 2018 · 2 Comments

Jamie Carragher spits and misses

England fans were less than surprised by Jamie Carragher’s failure to hit the target with his recent phlegm outburst.  Despite mustering a mouthful of spit, Carragher lacked the technical ability … Continue reading

March 15, 2018 · Leave a comment

Katy Perry fails to stop killing Nuns for Lent

Despite her promises to the contrary, the American singer and songwriter has continued with her murderous campaign against religious figures and penguin look-alikes.  While others use Easter as a time … Continue reading

March 14, 2018 · 2 Comments

Russian spy poisoned for ‘the secret of Brexit’

Double-agent Sergei Skripal is alleged to have been targeted as he knew the UK’s best kept secret – ‘how to make Brexit work’.  This classified information is so secret that … Continue reading

March 13, 2018 · Leave a comment

Trump thought he was agreeing to a date with Kim Kardashian

North Korean officials have declared their ‘honey trap’ a success, having lured President Trump with a bevy of attractive Kim’s; including Basinger, Cattrall and Philby.  Chief among these is Kim … Continue reading

March 12, 2018 · Leave a comment

Caption Competition: The new Terminator film sees a cyborg sent back in time, to prevent Jim Davidson from being born.

WINNER: The new Terminator film sees a cyborg sent back in time, to prevent Jim Davidson from being born. (from PensionsSimon) RUNNERS UP Mr Trump had already selected his suit … Continue reading

March 11, 2018 · 2 Comments

Man instantly regrets not looking in his handkerchief

Tobias Kowalewski (37) has become riddled with self-doubt and curiosity, since he pointedly refused to examine the contents of his handkerchief, after one particularly aggressive evacuation.  Not only was he … Continue reading

March 8, 2018 · Leave a comment

Despite doping scandal, cycling still not a real sport

The Digital, Culture, Media and Sport (DCMS) select committee has confirmed that ‘no amount of drugs’ can make cycling anything more than ‘a glorified paper-round’.  While Sir Bradley Wiggins & … Continue reading

March 7, 2018 · Leave a comment

Reformation (play script)


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