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The Truth about Goats

Facebook still can’t get you to ‘like’ your niece’s photo


While data-mining has been used to influence voting habits, consumerism and ‘the colour of rainbows’, Facebook has admitted that no one really cares about your cousin’s week long birthday celebration.  In fact, other than the voyeuristic pleasure of seeing a school bully with an inoperable tumour or an ex-partner’s bankruptcy, we have as much interest in Facebook content as we do the content of our belly-button.  Yes, its personal, but it is just fluff.

No matter how much arm-twisting or how many pop-up adverts involving undulating breasts, we cannot bring ourselves to ‘like’ the fact that ‘Julie is starting a new marketing job in Basingstoke’.  No matter how much Mark Zuckerberg may want to you to, you just don’t care that your wife’s hairdresser is recovering well from her appendectomy.

Explained one expert: ‘Data can be flawed.  When shown an image of melting icecaps, 90% of people don’t know if clicking ‘like’ means they are for or against global warming.  Yes, people like cutesy mems, but should the Trump campaign have cynically used the slogan ‘Build a wall…to keep the Mexicans from stealing our kittens’?’

Said one Facebook user: ‘If Cambridge Analytica couldn’t get me to do the Ice Bucket Challenge, how was it going to get me to vote for Brexit?  The only thing my data reveals is that I’m lying about everything.  My status is fake, my life is photoshopped and couldn’t give a sh$t if my nephew got into his first choice school’.

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This entry was posted on April 5, 2018 by in International Technology and tagged , , , , , , .

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