The Truth about Goats
Party-goers were thrown into turmoil when Paul Azikiwe, 29, attempted an overly ambitious hand-gesture which degenerated in a celebration of fascism, faster than a Daily Mail editorial. Subsequently, this has become the biggest Nazi faux pas since Prince Harry turned up at a fancy-dress party dressed as Edward VIII.
Surrounded by shocked friends and family, Mr. Azikiwe unleashed a full ‘Sieg Heil!’ with his left arm, while his right hand rested limply beneath his nose. At first some assumed that it was an ironic tribute to Freddie Starr, but his accompanying air-quotes and yell of ‘Who’s the daddy?’, soon put pay to that.
One mortified guest said: ‘Initially I thought this was Paul being Paul; like the time he first bumped his Gran in the chest. What should have been a congratulatory, almost jokey, gesture has turned into something racist – a bit like voting UKIP’.
An unrepentant Mr. Azikiwe followed up with finger guns in the direction of the gathered revellers, including one elderly war veteran; who said: ‘I’m old enough to remember Churchill making a pig’s ear of a Vulcan salute and turning it into some lame V for victory sign. But at least Winston had the good grace to finish it with Jazz Hands’.