The Truth about Goats
Listed as having several ‘not so careful’ owners, rail services on the East Coast Main Line have been discovered in a job lot of broken capitalism; alongside Carillion, RBS and a wax-work Peter Stringfellow.
The seller, a Mr. Grayling, admits that there is ‘some wear’ around the Edinburgh seams, but generally there are no rips, stains or untoward signs of profitability.
Lining: Richard Branson’s pocket
The lot is described as suitable for any rail enthusiast or fan of printing money. The starting bid of 99p has already got three watchers – The Department for Transport, the Island of Sodor and Gordon Gekko.
Postage tracking comes to £38bn and a signature in blood is required. The listing says that this railway set is: ‘a perfect example of Tory privatization…sold as seen’.