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Trump postpones military junta ‘to 2019’


President Trump’s plans for a Veterans’ Day military parade followed by a star-spangled dictatorship, have been delayed due to a shortage of tan-green uniforms in his size. Organizers have had to cancel 100 metric tonnes of bunting, a ‘monster-tank’ for Don Junior and the inevitable internment of all liberal elites.

Initially Trump had insisted that the parade honours those who have laid down for their country – starting with an inflatable Stormy Daniels. This will be followed by Trump’s new arms of the military; Space Force, Forced Consent and Forced Testimony.

Trump is said to have been inspired by North Korea’s own military parades and their public’s display of unconditional love and malnutrition. Unfortunately, the cost of $90 million far exceeds what the President is willing to a pay – unless it is used as part of a non-disclosure agreement.

A Trump spokeswoman said: ‘Originally the parade was due to take place in the streets of Washington DC, but we’re now hoping to extend the junta to the whole of the free world. President Trump has always respected the military, which is why the event will be lead by the Laker Girls. We will show the world that the US is no puppet-state…provided we get the go ahead from Mr. Putin’.

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This entry was posted on August 22, 2018 by in International Defense and tagged , , , , , , .

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