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Benjamin Netanyahu’s tweets to be read by WWE wrestler

Proving that history will eat itself and that irony is just a metal, but with more iron, Israel’s PM has gone ‘full Thanos’.  From this day forward, Mr. Netanyahu agreed that his speeches will be more accurately contextualized if shouted by spray-tanned steroid-abuser, lathered up with baby oil, while wearing nothing but a spandex thong.

Taking Godwin’s Law to be more of a guideline, Mr. Netanyahu explained that: ‘The weak crumble, are slaughtered and are erased from history’.  Which is no way plagiarizes a cheeky little speech from Munich 1933 (‘Providence shows no mercy to weak nations…’) but does use the same chord structure as Robin Thicke’s ‘Blurred Lines’

Many peace-loving Israeli’s are somewhat concerned that Mr. Netanyahu may have anger management issues. Contrary to popular belief ‘Social Darwinism’ does not mean a fondue party with a bunch of biologists.

A spokesman for Mr. Netanyahu explained: ‘After winning Eurovision, my advice is crush your enemies.  See them driven before you and hear the lamentations of their women.  And if it’s good enough for Conan the Barbarian, it’s good enough for Bibi’.


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This entry was posted on September 4, 2018 by in International News and tagged , , , , , , .

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