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The Truth about Goats

Trump leaves scathing TripAdvisor review for UK


 

The UK’s post-Brexit economic strategy to become an Airbnb for racist golfers, was dealt a humiliating blow when a Mr. D. Trump (50ish) awarded it only 2 stars – with 1 of those stars being for Hadrian’s Wall.  The President was critical that the country was infested with cockroaches, ‘Muslimists’ and homosexuals – or socialists as they are known.

In Mr. Trump’s defence, Britain had not been entirely honest with their advert – ‘Come visit a vibrant, functioning democracy, here in the heart of the EU’.  A more up to date description would have been ‘Economy to Let – one functioning toilet’.

A disappointed Trump witnessed countless examples of poor sanitation and deprivation; or ‘Austerity-lite’ as Theresa May calls it.  Likewise his hotel room was covered in semen, blood and faecal matter, but the President has subsequently apologised for that.

Mr. Trump said there was a complete lack of mints or urinating Russian prostitutes on his pillow.  He said the maid’s turndown service was a disgrace, as no woman ever turns down Mr. Trump.  As for the other servants, they were surly and unattractive – particularly the one called Elizabeth II.  While Melania’s only criticism was – ‘I asked for a single room’.

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This entry was posted on June 6, 2019 by in International Lifestyle and tagged , , , .

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