Flibbertigibbet News

The Truth about Goats

For sale – Schools to serve pints


That’s right, its that time again, when I try to flog a dead horse another annual.  2020 may be the last of these, as Newsbiscuit is planning its own seasonal … Continue reading

December 28, 2020 · Leave a comment

Twelve months of Lockdown


    On the twelfth month of Lockdown, Boris sent to me Twelve sightings of Cummings Eleven papers sniping Ten procurements a-leaping Nine nurses starving Eight lies a-milking Seven swabs … Continue reading

December 24, 2020 · Leave a comment

The Ghost of Christmas Furniture reminds you to put up shelves


A man from Hull, Michael Khatri, was recently visited by three alarming visions – the ghosts of Past Decoration Promises, of DIY Presents and of Furniture Construction.  This Dickensian nightmare … Continue reading

December 23, 2020 · Leave a comment

High alert, as engineers create a webcam that shows your bottom half


As more of us retreat to a world of virtual meetings, there is a growing concern that many people are not bothering with trousers and, in some cases, ‘going full … Continue reading

December 22, 2020 · Leave a comment

Woman loses soul after failing to read Minutes of last meeting


Haniya Reeves (32) inadvertently condemned herself to an eternity in the fiery lakes of Hell, by failing to pick up on an outstanding agenda item from the last meeting.  Sadly … Continue reading

December 21, 2020 · Leave a comment

Caption Competition: I’m not going to any more of these After-Stroke physio sessions, again!


I’m not going to any more of these After-Stroke physio sessions, again! (from Inchcock) The only safe way to eat a cherry tomato (from Judy_Brinch) Snooker just got interesting (From … Continue reading

December 21, 2020 · 1 Comment

Earth has its Galactic membership rejected on grounds of race 


An Israeli space scientist, Haim Eshed, claims the US has long been in contact with the Galactic Federation, which may explain why Reese Witherspoon never ages.  Sadly the Federation has … Continue reading

December 17, 2020 · Leave a comment

Multi-millionaire footballers are all Marxists


Millwall FC has finally exposed a secret Marxist cabal running the Premiership. Being a multi-billion-pound private industry was just a devious way of challenging the Bourgeoisie.  The fact that Raheem … Continue reading

December 16, 2020 · Leave a comment

15 Years of Typos


Looking for a Xmas stocking-filler? Or a good book to take to the loo? Why not buy ’NewsBiscuit: 15 Years of Typos’. This humble collection of stories is the culmination … Continue reading

December 15, 2020 · Leave a comment

Reformation (play script)

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