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Vaccine fears allayed as jab will improve your darts arm


Anti-vaccers have finally accepted that the advantages of the Covid jab far outweigh the risk, now that we can all throw arrows like Eric Bristow.  A scientist explained: ‘We had the option of microchipping the population but, in the end, settled for giving everyone a forearm like Popeye’.

The new bionic arm opens up a vast array of possibilities; including using it to swim in circles, crush walnuts and direct traffic, in a really assertive fashion. Hence the expression: ‘In the kingdom of the blind, the one-armed man is not really helping’.

One recently inoculated gentlemen said: ‘I can now hurl the discus 100 yards, arm wrestle a polar bear and wave like the Queen’.  Sadly, it does mean that most of us have a second withered arm. ‘It’s frustrating having a useless lump of flesh just flapping around. That’s normally my penis’.

Some who have had the vaccine say they have only experienced a sore arm, said one disappointed patient: ‘I asked for the pfizer jab and the Doctor shouted ‘pinch, punch first of the month, white rabbits, no return’’.

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This entry was posted on June 3, 2021 by in International Health and tagged , , .

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