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Man finds God through post-Christmas poo

‘It was a mystical experience,’ claimed Steve McClintock (37). ‘I’m not normally a praying man, but after six big meals and no sh$t, I was begging to have my spirit … Continue reading

January 4, 2021 · 1 Comment

Twelve months of Lockdown

    On the twelfth month of Lockdown, Boris sent to me Twelve sightings of Cummings Eleven papers sniping Ten procurements a-leaping Nine nurses starving Eight lies a-milking Seven swabs … Continue reading

December 24, 2020 · Leave a comment

Santa is going to bring Covid down the chimney

While all four UK nations have backed plans for families to mix on Christmas Day no one, as yet, has told the Coronavirus.  In fact, studies suggest that Covid-19 is … Continue reading

November 26, 2020 · Leave a comment

Archbishop to use sabbatical to become Scientologist

Justin Welby has said he plans to take three-month break from mainstream religion in 2021, to purse solo projects – and take up smoking weed.  Asked when he will be … Continue reading

November 25, 2020 · Leave a comment

Nobody but nobody missing Nativity Plays this year

While outwardly consoling their distraught wannabee ‘Mary’, all parents are secretly delighted not to have to sit through two hours of mind-numbingly bad drama.  Most were said to be happy … Continue reading

November 17, 2020 · Leave a comment

Cummings quits before Xmas, just in time to become Satan’s Little Helper

Christmas has come early for many Remainers, now that Dominic Cummings has agreed to step down to pursue his villainy in the private sector.  Accepting a post with Beelzebub will … Continue reading

November 16, 2020 · Leave a comment

Poppy Season to now coincide with Easter

With Keir Starmer insisting Poppies be worn in early October, MPs have now agreed that a ‘minor religious holiday’ should be replaced with two weeks of uninterrupted Poppy fetishism.  Explained … Continue reading

October 22, 2020 · Leave a comment

Bible banned from schools for anti-capitalist bias

  DfE guidance says that any content that criticises greed and profit must be removed from the curriculum; which is bad news for all major religions and Billy Bragg’s back … Continue reading

October 6, 2020 · Leave a comment

Huge Islamic State online library is just Katie Hopkins’ old Twitter feed

Terrorist experts have warned of a vast collection of extremist literature on the Internet, although early indications are that it was Katie Hopkins ranting about being served a coffee by … Continue reading

September 8, 2020 · Leave a comment

Reformation (play script)

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