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The Truth about Goats

Rees-Mogg opposed to contraception but ‘will cum on your tits’


The Tory backbencher and dyspeptic Harry Potter impersonator, has said that he is morally opposed to all forms of abortion; even in the event of the child becoming a Socialist. … Continue reading

September 12, 2017 · 4 Comments

Turkey’s jihadist curriculum ‘not traditional enough’, says Gove


While generally in favour of the controversial plan to give Turkey’s children a more religious and conservative education, the UK’s former Education Secretary said there was a missed opportunity to … Continue reading

September 4, 2017 · Leave a comment

End of Days feels a bit like the 70s


As we rush towards Armageddon, observers have noted that there are less fiery lakes and zombie hordes than expected – and a lot more bin strikes. With nuclear threat, a … Continue reading

August 24, 2017 · Leave a comment

Pope confirms Satan is a Celiac


In outlawing gluten-free bread for Holy Communion, the Bishop of Rome has decreed that an intolerance to wheat is a clear sign of witchery and being unnecessarily fussy about doughnuts. … Continue reading

August 3, 2017 · Leave a comment

Five ‘lost’ Archbishops caught with Poké Ball


A triumphant eight year old boy has become the first person to capture all Archbishops of Canterbury, alive and dead, using his Pokémon Go skills and saucer of milk.  The … Continue reading

May 10, 2017 · Leave a comment

Ireland commits blasphemy by criticising Stephen Fry


Police in the Republic of Ireland have launched an investigation into allegations that one TV viewer was anything less than effusive about Stephen Fry’s guest appearance on ‘Veep’.  As permanent … Continue reading

May 9, 2017 · Leave a comment

Easter ruined by spoiler


The Archbishop of Canterbury has come in for criticism by parenting groups and fans of Game of Thrones, for repeatedly giving away the ending to the series finale of ‘Jesus … Continue reading

April 13, 2017 · Leave a comment

Trump summons Cthulhu


As his first act as President, Mr. Trump has signed an executive order to unleash Lovecraftian terror upon an unsuspecting public.  Naturally this has caused some backlash with #NotMyCosmicEntity trending … Continue reading

February 1, 2017 · 2 Comments

Noah offers London-only rescue package


In the event of Biblical flooding or a Hard Brexit – whichever plague comes first – the UK Government will be devoting half of all its defences to the London … Continue reading

January 16, 2017 · Leave a comment

Reformation (play script)

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