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Category Archives: International Crime

Bill Cosby out of the Presidential election


In a surprise announcement, campaigners for ‘Cosby 2016’ have admitted that their candidate may now be too inappropriate to run for office.  Up until recently accusations of Cosby’s sexual misdeeds … Continue reading

June 9, 2016 · Leave a comment

Brussels’ carnage not enough to halt Trump coverage


Even though the actual Presidential race does not start until ‘f@$king July’, the world’s press continue to obsess about a series of primary contests that bear almost no relationship to … Continue reading

April 6, 2016 · Leave a comment

Austerity hits funding for terrorists


Speaking at the G20 summit, World Leaders have agreed to ‘cut off’ financial support for terrorists, which many would agree was an odd funding priority in the first place.  Western … Continue reading

November 30, 2015 · Leave a comment

American heroes criticised for ‘lack of guns’


US citizens Anthony Sadler and Alek Skarlatos brought shame to their nation, by employing unarmed techniques to foil a terror plot. In a blatant disregard for their beloved Second Amendment, … Continue reading

September 4, 2015 · 2 Comments

Racing anecdote used to anaesthetise Jenson Button


Ruthless burglars may have employed F1 stories and Eddie Jordan quips to reduce Mr & Mrs Button to catatonia. Police confirm that the couple were discovered in a drowsy state … Continue reading

August 19, 2015 · Leave a comment

Bill Cosby more ‘threatening’ than your average Sommelier


Despite rigorous denials of any wrong-doing, lawyers for Mr. Cosby have been forced to concede that he invariably mixed red wine with fish, over-poured champagne and mistook Rohypnol for a … Continue reading

July 30, 2015 · Leave a comment

Mexico offers $3.8m reward for ‘man-eating mole’


Officials at Altiplano jail have instigated a nationwide alert for mutant creature with ‘burrowing ability’, who has inadvertently created a subterranean passageway between their high security shower area and nearby … Continue reading

July 23, 2015 · Leave a comment

Public shocked by the wrong word in: ‘Young suicide bomber’


Thanks to a shortening of our attention spans, the majority of UK citizens only feel a heightened sense moral outrage for the beginnings of sentences but drift into apathy in … Continue reading

June 24, 2015 · Leave a comment

Correction: Bankers NOT imprisoned‏


It has come to our attention, that a typographical error may have given a false impression that employees at the world’s five largest banks are facing trial as a result … Continue reading

May 25, 2015 · Leave a comment

Reformation (play script)

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