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Category Archives: International Science

New organ not for masturbation purposes


Scientists have been disappointed to discover that the human body’s 80th organ, can in no way be used to spice up your love life or attract Russell Brand.  Sadly the … Continue reading

April 11, 2018 · Leave a comment

A slap in the face with a wet fish, not as ‘bad’ as first thought


Scientists have discovered that mankind’s historical aversion to a facial pumelling by a haddock or trout, is nowhere near as unpleasant as Brexit negotiations or five minutes of Keith Lemon.  … Continue reading

March 22, 2018 · 2 Comments

Adolescence lasts until 24, but being a ‘little pr$ck’ is timeless


Sociologists are now suggesting that being obnoxious may extend well beyond the teenage years, citing the House of Commons as a perfect example of regressive behaviour, poor hygiene and hormones … Continue reading

February 6, 2018 · Leave a comment

Doomsday Clock forgot to factor in British Summer Time


The Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists (BAS) has admitted an error in calculating the end of the world; partly down to nuclear proliferation but mainly caused by a confusion between … Continue reading

January 30, 2018 · Leave a comment

Last man to fake Moon walk dies


Gene Cernan, 82, has passed away and has taken the secret of this elaborate hoax to the grave.  Scientists now acknowledge that the Moon is a 2,000km block of cheese … Continue reading

January 24, 2017 · Leave a comment

‘It’s not you, it’s me’ say HP printers


A large number of printers are now rejecting budget ink cartridges for spurious reasons; such as age difference, life being ‘too complicated’ right now or that they are seeing someone … Continue reading

November 1, 2016 · Leave a comment

Apple reduces bodily orifices down to one


Having phased out the redundant headphone socket, hardware designers have turned their attention to the outmoded bOdy 2.0. Removing all but the face aperture, Apple hope that this slimmed-down version … Continue reading

September 26, 2016 · Leave a comment

Mammoths fatally addicted to salted peanuts


Scientist now believe that the Ice Age beasts died of thirst due to a combination of Pleistocene pretzels, cheap margaritas and no access to chilled cans of Dr. Pepper.  The … Continue reading

August 16, 2016 · Leave a comment

Uber invest in driver-less tax avoidance


Having already stripped back safety provision, the US car-hailing company is now pioneering new ways to increase profits while removing the last vestige of human liability. Cars that have been … Continue reading

June 7, 2016 · 3 Comments

Reformation (play script)

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