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The Truth about Goats

Are naked auditions unfairly labelled as ‘creepy as f$ck’?


As further allegations of sexual misconduct are levelled at film directors, most of the public are questioning why ‘naked’ interviews are deemed more reliable than a well-referenced curriculum vitae. With … Continue reading

May 5, 2021 · Leave a comment

JK’s alleged transphobia was just part of her book launch


  In what is being heralded as a canny bit of marketing, the author has deliberately stoked a summer of gender controversy, in order to shift a few more copies … Continue reading

September 23, 2020 · Leave a comment

UK to spend £1.57bn to avoid watching light opera


The Government has announced that it is preferable to pay the UK’s arts venues to remain shut, than to actually watch the pretentious nonsense they would be staging. The Coronavirus … Continue reading

July 13, 2020 · Leave a comment

Matt Hancock’s ventilator procurement an elaborate April Fool’s day prank


Pranksters throughout the UK saluted the Health Minister’s commitment to slapstick and turning protecting the British public into an ‘absolute joke’.   Many have likened him to the new Dom … Continue reading

April 1, 2020 · Leave a comment

COVID-19 headlining Reading Festival


Festival organisers have confirmed that coronavirus, after a busy world tour, will be on the main stage at Reading and on ‘pretty much everything else’.  Although it will be a … Continue reading

March 16, 2020 · Leave a comment

Emmeline Pankhurst to star as Jess Phillips, in biopic of Jess Phillips


The BBC have announced that they a making a TV series about Britain’s most important female political figure; documenting her struggles to learn lacrosse at Grammar School and having a … Continue reading

July 9, 2019 · Leave a comment

Spice Girls’ concert hit by sound problems – fans could hear them


Fans at the Cardiff’s Principality Stadium have complained that the pop divas were clearly audible throughout their performance. Said one fan: ‘I didn’t pay £100 to hear a cacophony of … Continue reading

May 30, 2019 · Leave a comment

Glastonbury sells out on news that ‘there will be face-painting’


Booking lines have been inundated, with festival goers hoping to experience the once in a lifetime experience of having a sparkly butterfly drawn on their face, by someone with a … Continue reading

October 24, 2018 · Leave a comment

University graduation to be modelled on Logan’s Run


Damian Hinds has laid out his vision for the schooling system, which will culminate in all graduates being vaporized to avoid the disappointment of low-wage gig-economy.  Anyone over 21 will … Continue reading

October 17, 2018 · Leave a comment

Reformation (play script)

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