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The Truth about Goats

Guest speaker finally realises Prezi is ‘a bit sh$t’


At precisely 3 p.m. today, Hazeema Chandio (32) reached a moment of epiphany; that instead of an organized set of slides, she had created a jazz-fusion mood-board that would make … Continue reading

June 20, 2018 · 1 Comment

Tesco removes Brexit’s ‘best before’ date


Under pressure from the Government, Tesco’s have agreed to extend the length of time that Brexit negotiations can be left on the shelf.  While the best before date for leaving … Continue reading

June 7, 2018 · Leave a comment

East Coast Railway franchise found on Ebay


Listed as having several ‘not so careful’ owners, rail services on the East Coast Main Line have been discovered in a job lot of broken capitalism; alongside Carillion, RBS and … Continue reading

May 30, 2018 · Leave a comment

Carillion used May’s ‘strong and stable’ cement mix


Construction giant Carillion is on the verge of collapse after taking building advice from Theresa May – a leader with all the durability of aluminum siding.  Unbeknownst to Carillion, the … Continue reading

January 17, 2018 · Leave a comment

Surgeons remove Young Person’s Railcard from Chancellor


Philip Hammond’s attempt to woo young voters and train-spotters with his Budget, has resulted in several hours of intrusive rectal surgery.  NHS doctors assured the Chancellor that having a railcard … Continue reading

November 27, 2017 · Leave a comment

UK interest rate raised to ‘mildly curious’


The Bank of England is considering injecting some enthusiasm into being British, with a 0.25% increase in engaging anecdotes and witty comments. Economists fear a stagnation in the nation’s ability … Continue reading

November 13, 2017 · Leave a comment

£1 coin notices the locks have changed


To the outsider, it has been obvious for some time that the relationship between the old £1 and the Bank of England has been fragile; with the Bank often out … Continue reading

October 17, 2017 · Leave a comment

Self-drive Lorry serial-killers launched


Mysterious unmarked vans and lorries will be trialled throughout the UK, each carrying a robot capable of committing untraceable sex-crimes, while quoting from ‘Smokey & the Bandit’.  Then with the … Continue reading

August 31, 2017 · Leave a comment

Student still pretending to have read ‘Austin’ £10


Gemma Effiong, 17, has finally confessed to having never looked at the Jane Austen-themed tenner and has been relying on Sparknotes for all her currency questions.  When quizzed by her … Continue reading

August 2, 2017 · Leave a comment

Reformation (play script)

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