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The Truth about Goats

Salisbury house for sale. Buyer must have own Hazmat suit.


Sergei Skripal’s home has been snapped up by the UK Government, clearly inspired by Sarah Beeny’s ‘Help! My house is full of WMD’.  Said one tax payer: ‘Its great value … Continue reading

July 31, 2018 · Leave a comment

Couple in critical condition after being exposed to ‘pure brexit’


A man and woman found unconscious in Wiltshire may have come into contact with, what chemists are describing as a compound made from ‘Voldemort’s nose, Freddy Krueger’s finger nails and … Continue reading

July 17, 2018 · Leave a comment

Russian spy poisoned for ‘the secret of Brexit’


Double-agent Sergei Skripal is alleged to have been targeted as he knew the UK’s best kept secret – ‘how to make Brexit work’.  This classified information is so secret that … Continue reading

March 13, 2018 · Leave a comment

Profumo shagged Nazis and Communists – what a legend!


GQ magazine has nominated deceased Tory War Minister, John Profumo, as ‘Shagger of the Year’, for his total commitment to getting his end away with a variety of spies.  Unconcerned … Continue reading

December 4, 2017 · Leave a comment

London reels from another Trump tweet


A manhunt is underway for the individual who left an ‘unexploded piece of bullshit’ on social media.  Security services say that the makeshift tweet had all the hallmarks of a … Continue reading

September 19, 2017 · Leave a comment

Van hire technically an act of terrorism


As the Ford Transit becomes the weapon of choice for every would-be killer or decorator, sadly ‘Vanarama’ is now comparable to an Arms Dealership.  In turn this has meant that … Continue reading

July 4, 2017 · Leave a comment

London saved by water cannons


A terrorist attack on Westminster was foiled yesterday by the swift deployment of Boris Johnson’s three water cannons.  Sitting astride the gun turret, Mr. Johnson hosed down bystanders and removed … Continue reading

April 12, 2017 · Leave a comment

War memorial has the face of Tony Blair


Sculptor Paul Day surprised the public by unveiling a sculpture commemorating the Iraq and Afghanistan wars, which has Anthony Charles Lynton Blair’s ‘sh$t eating grin’ plastered across it.  As with … Continue reading

March 28, 2017 · Leave a comment

Trident: Coming, unintentionally, to a city near you


The Prime Minister gave her full-throated support for nuclear missile system that has all the accuracy of drunk aiming for the toilet bowl. Despite knowing that Trident was unable to … Continue reading

February 14, 2017 · 1 Comment

Reformation (play script)

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