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The Truth about Goats

Snow day under Lockdown a bit ‘samey’


School children up and down the land, were celebrating a day spent at home due heavy snowfall, only to discover that that it is essentially a repeat of the whole … Continue reading

February 15, 2021 · Leave a comment

Beavers building Exmoor dam heralds return of The White Witch


While the National Trust is excited by beavers making their first return since the 16th century, the rest of the UK is braced for a re-enactment of The Lion, the … Continue reading

December 3, 2020 · Leave a comment

Illegal raves are fine, provided you are carrying a Grouse


  As the lockdown ‘rule of six’ extends to all social gatherings, except hunting, teenagers are resorting to wearing jodhpurs to nightclubs and taking deer to house parties.  Weddings are … Continue reading

September 22, 2020 · Leave a comment

You can’t ban Katie Hopkins you have to sprinkle salt on her


In attempting to permanently remove Katie Hopkins from their platform, Twitter have made the classic error of not putting a stake through her heart, or at the very least, using … Continue reading

June 24, 2020 · Leave a comment

Isle of Wight to ban penny-farthing from town centre


In an attempt to cut congestion, Ventnor council has decided to remove horse drawn carts, sedan chairs and speeding mobility scooters from the main thoroughfare.  Locals are said to have … Continue reading

April 28, 2020 · Leave a comment

Shadowy fence-panelling cartel behind Storm Ciara


Evidence has emerged that the havoc wrecked upon the UK’s gardens, by severe gales, may have been premeditated.  Rather than an example of climate change, Storm Ciara is thought to … Continue reading

February 13, 2020 · Leave a comment

QC promises to bludgeon to death all Brexiteers


Renowned Remain lawyer and killer of foxes, Jolyon Maugham, has set out an ambitious schedule of vermin and referendum ‘elimination’. Wearing his wife’s green kimono, he promised to use a … Continue reading

January 9, 2020 · Leave a comment

Leech claims to be a ‘blood creator’


Medical research normally endorses the careful removal of a parasite, but some leeches are of the opinion that if it was not for them, no blood would ever be produced. … Continue reading

November 5, 2019 · Leave a comment

Environmentalist secretly wants the world to end so they can say ‘I told you so’


An unnamed member of the Extinction Rebellion has said she was torn between doing the right thing, with it’s fleeting satisfaction, as opposed to the sheer unbridled joy of being … Continue reading

October 24, 2019 · Leave a comment

Reformation (play script)

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