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The Truth about Goats

Dr Who regeneration plot line part of NHS ‘long term plan’

In the absence of any real increase in nursing or funding, the NHS is going to have to depend upon implausible plot devices and a lifetime’s supply of Tiger Balm.  … Continue reading

January 15, 2019 · Leave a comment

Hospitals not ‘overcrowded’ they are just popular

Ministers were quick to clarify that the Christmas queues for hospital admission, were caused by the draw of resort-like facilities, the mortuary’s ever-popular Santa’s grotto and the fact that rickets … Continue reading

December 18, 2018 · Leave a comment

‘Standing desks’ boost work performance claim shoe salesmen

Insole and corn-plaster manufacturers have come out in favour of the health benefits of standing at work.  Which by coincidence, has also been endorsed by the Guild of Cobblers, the … Continue reading

November 6, 2018 · Leave a comment

Missing £1bn in sickness benefit found in 1970’s charity box

The Department for Work and Pensions (DWP) have blamed a ceramic boy with callipers and ‘a haircut like Jimmy Carr’, for the fact that tens of thousands of people have … Continue reading

November 1, 2018 · Leave a comment

‘Weight Watchers’ sinister rebrand – Just ‘Watchers’

The dieting company has decided to ditch ‘weight’ from their name, in order to corner the market in slim-line voyeurs and svelte stalkers. A spokeswoman explained: ‘We’ve struggled with the … Continue reading

October 9, 2018 · Leave a comment

Tom Watson ‘reversed’ type-2 socialism

Through a diet of Peter Mandelson and regular exercise – running from his socialist principles – Labour’s deputy leader has revealed he is clear of all leftist tendencies.  A slim-line … Continue reading

September 13, 2018 · Leave a comment

May to give NHS ‘birthday present’ of HMV vouchers

Despite claiming to have found another £20bn for the NHS in left over change from the DUP, the Prime Minister has drawn up a gift list involving socks, scented candles … Continue reading

July 2, 2018 · Leave a comment

National Trust to take over the NHS

With a projected shortfall of £50bn by 2030, Theresa May has taken the decision to designate the NHS as a ‘grade-2 listed’ institution, in need of some ‘significant crowd-funding’.  As … Continue reading

June 18, 2018 · Leave a comment

One in 25 children ‘too fat to go in goal’

Severe obesity is leading to a national shortage of suitable kids to pick last for activities, meaning other minority groups have moved down the pecking order; including children with squints, … Continue reading

June 12, 2018 · 1 Comment

Reformation (play script)


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