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Hampshire cedes to Northern Independence Party

After much soul searching one of the UK’s southern most counties, has decided to join the North’s push for independence and better Wi-Fi. The capture of Hampshire will mean that … Continue reading

April 6, 2021 · Leave a comment

Wales no longer the size of Wales

Due to coastal erosion and leakage on Gloucester border, Wales has shrunk from its traditional dimensions, thus becoming an area the size of less than Wales. Instead, Slovenia will now … Continue reading

March 1, 2021 · Leave a comment

Zero evidence to suggest Northerners don’t’ wash their hands – but it sounds true

There is a growing suspicion amongst those who have never been north of the Watford gap, that Covid hotspots are caused by unsanitary Geordies and Liverpudlians who take baths with … Continue reading

October 21, 2020 · Leave a comment

Boris to split up with his new girlfriend before they even start dating

Continuity experts have been flummoxed by internet rumours that the Prime Minister may have already moved onto his fifth wife; skipping over number four, various plot twists and all sense … Continue reading

September 16, 2020 · Leave a comment

Man claiming to speak for everyone, probably not defusing fears of a global conspiracy

Hearing voices in your head is commonly known as a hallucination, hearing no voices but claiming to represent millions is primarily called ‘having a YouTube channel’. More recently, Martin Jenks … Continue reading

July 7, 2020 · Leave a comment

Even The Proclaimers say Dominic Cummings went too far

As further allegations emerge that the PM’s advisor broke lockdown, it has become clear that: ‘If Captain Tom can do laps, why can’t Dominic do lengths?’. Even if banned from … Continue reading

June 3, 2020 · Leave a comment

The whole of UK now wants to visit Barnard Castle

Thanks to a one-hour interview with Dominic Cummings, the British public are now convinced that a 12th century ruin, in Teesside, is the gateway to Narnia. So jealous are they … Continue reading

May 27, 2020 · Leave a comment

Johnson just like Churchill…at Gallipoli

Acting like a wartime leader is all very well; but is probably inadvisable if the war is Little Bighorn and your choice of leader is General Custer. Unfortunately for Boris … Continue reading

May 19, 2020 · Leave a comment

Isle of Wight tracing app is just a man ringing bell shouting ‘unclean’

An NHS app aimed at limiting the spread of Coronavirus, is being trialled on the Isle of Wight; alongside transistor radios, the typewriter and toilets that flush. Despite this, the … Continue reading

May 14, 2020 · Leave a comment

Reformation (play script)

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