Flibbertigibbet News

The Truth about Goats

Isle of Wight didn’t even know we were part of the EU


While the rest of the UK is forced into deciding which Etonian to be lied to, residents of Queen Victoria’s ‘favourite place to die’ are somewhat out of-the-loop.  Unaware of … Continue reading

March 10, 2016 · Leave a comment

Three little pigs commissioned to build 13,000 new homes


The Prime Minister has taken the unprecedented decision to be guided by fairy tales from the land-of-make-believe or his ‘big society’ as he calls it. Drawing on the construction acumen … Continue reading

January 28, 2016 · Leave a comment

‘Home Alone’/’It’s a Wonderful Life’ schism irreconcilable


UN representatives have admitted to an impasse in negotiations for a lasting peace over television priorities during the festive period.  Families have been split asunder, with a divide between cinematic-slapstick … Continue reading

December 22, 2015 · Leave a comment

Gran runs ‘crystalized ginger’ lab


Police have warned the public that in the run up to Christmas to be on the lookout for the tell-tale signs of family members experimenting with ‘festive highs’.  Fears have … Continue reading

December 21, 2015 · Leave a comment

Met Office to be replaced by giant Pine Cone


The BBC will no longer depend on the Met Office for its weather reports and will now use more reliable methods, such as ‘chicken entrails’. Instead of some expensive guff … Continue reading

September 30, 2015 · Leave a comment

SNP to replace daylight savings with ‘borrowed time‏’


Scotland’s First Minister has rejected David Cameron’s insistence on a shared British clock and has proposed a move to a system where by the Scots, under cover of darkness, could … Continue reading

September 24, 2015 · Leave a comment

House of Commons identified as a brownfield site


As part of Chancellor George Osborne’s policy to liberate planning permissions, several of London’s most dilapidated eyesores have been scheduled for demolition. Rather than face a repair bill of £5.7bn, … Continue reading

July 21, 2015 · Leave a comment

Swinger’s festival uses loud music to drown out bonking noises‏


Despite complaints from local residents about noise levels, organisers of ‘Swingfields’ have insisted that their blaring disco music was better than the sound of ‘constant squelching’. In fact, the weekend … Continue reading

July 16, 2015 · 2 Comments

IS secretly supports Butlins


By diverting their terror campaign towards international holiday resorts, the Islamic State has underlined their fundamentalist belief in ‘affordable camp sites’. Many have misconstrued the massacres and bombings as an … Continue reading

July 9, 2015 · Leave a comment

Reformation (play script)

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