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The Truth about Goats

Daily Mail distances itself from Daily Mail


In a remarkable act of contortion and sophistry, The Daily Mail has taken the extraordinary step of disavowing all knowledge of Katie Hopkins, Mail Online and the whereabouts of the … Continue reading

June 26, 2017 · Leave a comment

Joe Biden still loose in The White House


Pest control has confirmed that an elderly male is trapped underneath the floorboards of the West Wing and is refusing to be lured out, even with lucrative offers from the … Continue reading

February 10, 2017 · Leave a comment

Depp in ironic custody battle for his dogs


Divorce documents have been filed by Johnny Depp and his actress wife Amber Heard, citing ‘irreconcilable dogs’ as the cause.  The couple are now facing a protracted three-way battle with … Continue reading

June 30, 2016 · Leave a comment

More Grammar schools should lead to more Morlocks


Education Secretary Nicky Morgan is to confirm an expansion in selective schooling, in order to finally create a race of ‘troglodyte over-lords’. In a homage to H. G. Wells’ novel, … Continue reading

November 3, 2015 · Leave a comment

Pamplona to replace bulls with pilgrims


Responding to criticism of animal cruelty, the Mayor of Pamplona has set out proposals to capitalize on reports of yet another Hajj stampede. Rather than see the loss of human … Continue reading

October 13, 2015 · Leave a comment

Cameron opens EU talks with a raspberry noise


The Prime Minister has begun his discussions with other European leaders, with the bold gambit of pulling his trousers down and inviting spectators to ‘kiss my pink tushie’. Many political … Continue reading

May 28, 2015 · Leave a comment

Doctors admit clusters ‘bad’ in surgery but ‘good’ in cereal


Advertsing experts and medical professionals are now at loggerheads over the division of adjectives to describe unpleasant illnesses versus moreish wheat-based meals. Some members of the public have been duped … Continue reading

October 1, 2014 · Leave a comment

Richard Scudamore challenges all women to an arm-wrestle


With what is being seen as a vain attempt to garner support for his derogatory references to ‘female irrationality’, the Premier League’s chief executive has promised to prove his gender’s … Continue reading

June 3, 2014 · 3 Comments

Google can no longer remember Belgium


Over the next few days Internet experts hope to gauge the extent of the data loss by cross-referencing ‘disastrous colonial policies’ with coquettish photos of Audrey Hepburn. Since the European … Continue reading

May 27, 2014 · Leave a comment

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