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The Truth about Goats

I’m making it up as I go along, admits Boris

As the Prime Minister kickstarts the second wave of Corvid-19 infections by personally spitting in everyone’s pint, there is a growing suspicion that he has been winging it; like an … Continue reading

July 9, 2020 · Leave a comment

Boris allowed to organise opening of pubs – but not piss-ups in breweries

The Prime Minister has declared a significant relaxing of lockdown rules, with 2m distancing to be downgraded to ‘no tongues’. Unfortunately, Mr Johnson’s track record on planning is patchy; be … Continue reading

June 29, 2020 · Leave a comment

Boris promises to clap migrant NHS staff – in irons

In support of the NHS workers who saved his life, the PM has chosen to reward them with a big, fat kick to the balls. Exploited, fined and deported, these … Continue reading

June 4, 2020 · Leave a comment

Johnson just like Churchill…at Gallipoli

Acting like a wartime leader is all very well; but is probably inadvisable if the war is Little Bighorn and your choice of leader is General Custer. Unfortunately for Boris … Continue reading

May 19, 2020 · Leave a comment

‘Contingency plans’ for Boris’ death, still the best plan on offer

Despite staff at St. Thomas’ Hospital pronouncing Mr. Johnson ‘brain dead’ on arrival, he has now resumed his day to day duties. Death rates to the coronavirus have actually gone … Continue reading

May 13, 2020 · Leave a comment

Boris working towards a Darwin Award

The PM is hoping to be short-listed for the prestigious international award for causing one’s own death, through outright stupidity. Hopefully, while in intensive care, he will have time to … Continue reading

April 9, 2020 · Leave a comment

Boris gets virus, Nadine Dorries’ husband gets suspicious

The Prime Minister has admitted to contracting the virus and although the virus is expected to make a full recovery, many female work colleagues are said to have got quite … Continue reading

April 2, 2020 · Leave a comment

UK volunteers to be placebo control group

While the rest of the world closes airports, schools and branches of Woolworths, Britain has decided to go it alone with the Coronavirus. Instead of avoidance, the UK has an … Continue reading

March 17, 2020 · Leave a comment

Boris to build high-speed rail bridge – for ‘faster deportation’

The Prime Minister has agreed to combine HS2, the Scots/Irish bridge and a bunch of flowers into a turbo-charged method for jettisoning British citizens. Not content with stripping the Windrush … Continue reading

March 4, 2020 · Leave a comment

Reformation (play script)

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