Flibbertigibbet News

The Truth about Goats

I’m not a quitter, says Theresa May – thus making Brexit somewhat confusing  


  Despite Civil Servants trying to explain Brexit to the Prime Minister, with the aid of flow charts and glove puppets, there still exists a nagging doubt that she does … Continue reading

February 7, 2018 · Leave a comment

Adolescence lasts until 24, but being a ‘little pr$ck’ is timeless


Sociologists are now suggesting that being obnoxious may extend well beyond the teenage years, citing the House of Commons as a perfect example of regressive behaviour, poor hygiene and hormones … Continue reading

February 6, 2018 · Leave a comment

Doomsday Clock forgot to factor in British Summer Time


The Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists (BAS) has admitted an error in calculating the end of the world; partly down to nuclear proliferation but mainly caused by a confusion between … Continue reading

January 30, 2018 · Leave a comment

Lord Adonis is still a funny name


Despite his resignation over some issue or other, about a thing or whatever, the public are agreed that they cannot get past the ridiculousness of Lord Adonis’ name or the … Continue reading

January 8, 2018 · Leave a comment

No one has ever used the word ‘Youthquake’


Despite claims by the Oxford Dictionary that ‘Youthquake’ is a word, most teenagers agree that it is only a phrase to use, if you want to get ridiculed on social … Continue reading

January 3, 2018 · Leave a comment

Twas the night before Brexit (- at this rate, probably by December 2026)


Twas the night before Brexit and all through the House Of Commons, no sex occurred. No hand down a blouse. The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, With … Continue reading

December 21, 2017 · Leave a comment

David Davis unsure what to get Jean-Claude Juncker for Secret Santa


The Brexit Secretary has expressed his concerns about what to get ‘the President who has everything’.  Having drawn Mr. Junker in the EU’s Secret Santa, Mr. Davis may well be … Continue reading

December 18, 2017 · Leave a comment

DUP demands ‘dado rail’ rather than soft border


The EU negotiations have been thrown into turmoil by the Democratic Unionist Party insisting on the same coving and ‘wall accoutrements’ as other UK properties.  Theresa May had hoped to … Continue reading

December 11, 2017 · Leave a comment

Surgeons remove Young Person’s Railcard from Chancellor


Philip Hammond’s attempt to woo young voters and train-spotters with his Budget, has resulted in several hours of intrusive rectal surgery.  NHS doctors assured the Chancellor that having a railcard … Continue reading

November 27, 2017 · Leave a comment
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