Flibbertigibbet News

The Truth about Goats

You’re paid less because you’re sh$t at your job


A landmark study has revealed that the wage gap you are experiencing, is simply down to you being worse than your work colleagues. Explained your line-manger: ‘I’m biased, but not … Continue reading

January 21, 2019 · Leave a comment

Caption Competition: ‘And I am pleased to announce that Jacob Rees-Mogg has been transported back to the 18th Century’


WINNER: ‘And I am pleased to announce that Jacob Rees-Mogg has been transported back to the 18th Century‘ (from Titus) RUNNERS UP Calls for a People’s Vote on 1922 result … Continue reading

January 20, 2019 · 2 Comments

Miley Cyrus & Liam Hemsworth announce 2020 divorce


Publicists for the celebratory pair were pleased to announce the couple’s imminent nuptials, quickly followed by a flurry of lucrative media interest and to culminate in the inevitable break-up. The … Continue reading

January 17, 2019 · Leave a comment

China Moon Mission: Pink Floyd album an elaborate scam


Having landed on the dark side of the moon, Chinese scientists have confirmed a complete lack of quadraphonic music and ‘almost no evidence’ of 1970’s prog-rock.   Instead, the Chang’e-4 probe … Continue reading

January 14, 2019 · Leave a comment

Caption Competition: Fans say the cast of Mummy Mia 2 are too old


WINNER: Fans say the cast of Mummy Mia 2 are too old (from BotTheDot) RUNNERS UP ‘Mr Trump? Wake up – it’s time to go to work’ (From Nicktoon5) Brexit … Continue reading

January 13, 2019 · Leave a comment

Shit creek contractor has never ‘actually’ used paddle before


In the event of a no-deal Brexit – or karma as it is known – the British government has entrusted part of their ferry service to a firm without any … Continue reading

January 10, 2019 · Leave a comment

Gabon foils military coup by having a ‘People’s Vote’


The Gabonese Government has managed to avoid open rebellion by having offering a second Brexit referendum.  This follows five soldiers taking control of the national radio station; demanding an end … Continue reading

January 9, 2019 · Leave a comment

Nightmares caused by farts you don’t let out


Scientists have discovered that repressed flatulence gives rise to your inner demons and can result in disturbing images; such as ghosts, monsters or Theresa May running in a field of … Continue reading

January 8, 2019 · Leave a comment

New ‘drone detection’ system involves two paper cups and a piece of string


Security Minister Ben Wallace has insisted that Gatwick will suffer no further disruptions, thanks to a pair of opera glasses and the 1987 Puffin edition of ‘I spy drones’. Using … Continue reading

January 3, 2019 · Leave a comment

Reformation (play script)

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