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The Truth about Goats

Having two votes in an election is the most Tory thing you can do


Thousands of activists have been issued with more than one ballot for the Conservative election – allowing them to have twice as many reasons not to support either candidate.  Those … Continue reading

July 18, 2019 · Leave a comment

Unexploded baby discovered at wedding


Despite a clear warning on the invitation – ‘no children’ – extremist relatives have chosen to unleash a full-throated baby on an innocent wedding ceremony; upsetting at least one innocent … Continue reading

July 5, 2017 · Leave a comment

Barnum & Bailey release clowns ‘back into the wild’


As ‘the greatest show on earth’ closes, many a Harlequin or Auguste will be returning to their natural habitat – a pie factory, the fevered imagination of Stephen King or … Continue reading

June 21, 2017 · Leave a comment

Corbyn wins Under-20 World Cup


Despite being an Arsenal fan, Jeremy Corbyn has led England’s Under-20s to their first electoral upset since 1966.  Through a combination of ‘kick it and hope’ and Theresa May still … Continue reading

June 14, 2017 · 2 Comments

‘Of course it can get worse’ says triumphant May


Waving to a handpicked crowd, with snipers aimed at them, the newly elected Prime Minister renewed her message of hope; hope that Brexit was a cheese-dream, hope that her husband … Continue reading

June 13, 2017 · Leave a comment

Biff, Chip and Kipper and the ‘not-so-free’ school meal


Mum was reading an election leaflet: ‘Fuck me.  Mrs May says she will no longer be providing free school lunches.’ ‘She’s not normally such a bitch,’ observed Chip. ‘Not that … Continue reading

June 8, 2017 · Leave a comment

May: ‘The first rule of debate club is no one attends debate club’


While the electorate may have wondered where the Prime Minister was hiding, those ‘in the know’ were watching her last night in an underground car-park, bare-knuckle boxing with Brad Pitt-lookalike, … Continue reading

June 5, 2017 · Leave a comment

Trump legalizes sex with daughters


In a landmark ruling, the new President of the US has prioritized reducing the stigma attached to fatherly love and ‘pussy grabbing’; in a clear attempt to bring America and … Continue reading

November 15, 2016 · Leave a comment

Bricklayers rejoice!


The election of President Trump is not just a victory for orange people everywhere but an overwhelming mandate for those in the wall-building industry or Muslims who never wanted to … Continue reading

November 9, 2016 · Leave a comment

Reformation (play script)

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