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Office worker still thinks manual labour ‘looks relaxing’


Gazing at workmen assembling scaffolding outside his office window, Joshua Millingsworth (29) told all within earshot, that working class people ‘don’t have a care in the world’.  Based on years … Continue reading

August 14, 2017 · 2 Comments

Electorate displaying signs of ‘Stockholm Syndrome’


Despite years of abuse, most voters look set to ask Theresa May for five more years of bondage and tax avoidance – making the Tory manifesto feel more like ‘Fifty … Continue reading

June 12, 2017 · Leave a comment

Murdoch says you can vote now


Our benevolent overlord, Rupert Murdoch, has granted a day of democracy for the collective chattel – provided, of course, they vote for his preferred minion.  To help us in our … Continue reading

June 8, 2017 · Leave a comment

Biff, Chip and Kipper and the ‘not-so-free’ school meal


Mum was reading an election leaflet: ‘Fuck me.  Mrs May says she will no longer be providing free school lunches.’ ‘She’s not normally such a bitch,’ observed Chip. ‘Not that … Continue reading

June 8, 2017 · Leave a comment

Adult voters secretly ‘excited’ about destroying their children’s future


As the General Election looms, like an iceberg or a prostate examination, the UK’s electorate is surreptitiously looking forward to the prospect of ‘sticking it to the young’.  With a … Continue reading

June 7, 2017 · Leave a comment

UK asked to choose between Internment Camps, the Final Solution or Box No.3


In what seems to be the worst game-show ever, Britain is now being asked to pick the lesser of all evils – when it seems that all the options are … Continue reading

June 6, 2017 · 4 Comments

Labour offers M&S food delivery


In what, is seen, as a deliberate attempt to pander to aspiring voters, Jeremy Corbyn has promised home delivery of all their favourite middle-class treats; such as artisanal breads, free-range … Continue reading

May 16, 2017 · Leave a comment

If you vote Tory – ‘f$cking own it’!


With a General Election looming and a post-election depression inevitable, many Conservatives are looking for ways to continue their Faustian Pact, while retaining the right to ‘b$tch and moan’ about … Continue reading

May 4, 2017 · 2 Comments

Johnson: ‘I meant to say Muggle’


Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson clarified his stance on allowing non-wizards into the House of Commons, accusing the Labour party leader of being a muggle-born pacifist.  A man of many … Continue reading

May 2, 2017 · Leave a comment

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