Flibbertigibbet News

The Truth about Goats

Russell Brand’s plums soon to go on sale


Britain’s shoppers will soon be able to buy alongside anthocyanin-infused tomatoes,  the genetically-modified scrotum of our favourite lascivious tramp. Mr. Brand’s ‘swollen nuts’, with their distinctive purple bruising, will be … Continue reading

February 7, 2014 · Leave a comment

Drop in piracy attributed to rise in ninja attacks


The long running internet debate over ‘who would win in a fight’ between swashbucklers and Japanese assassins has at last been resolved. With sea based piracy at a six year … Continue reading

January 16, 2014 · Leave a comment

Abattoir workers asked to remove ‘blindfolds’


Horse meat scandals in the UK and the contamination of donkey meat with fox in the US, has led to calls for a cessation of centuries of slaughterhouse practice. Workers … Continue reading

January 6, 2014 · Leave a comment

‘Miley Cyrus releases own range of ‘penis beakers”


Not content to promote her new album with an obligatory graphic video, twitter rant and sense of desperation; the new ‘Queen of Shock’ has decided sell glass and tupperware, themed … Continue reading

October 14, 2013 · Leave a comment

“PRISM unfollows Ricky Gervais”


In a move that has created zero impact in the Twitter world but significant surprise in the Intelligence gathering community, the NSA’s data mining program has ceased to monitor the … Continue reading

August 2, 2013 · Leave a comment

Facebook offers comfort to “comfort women”


In an unprecedented move to avoid future litigation, Mark Zuckerberg announced that he would be asking for forgiveness across a range of sexual exploitation issues. Having already apologised to the … Continue reading

May 31, 2013 · Leave a comment

Ennui found on Bieber tour bus in Sweden


Stockholm police say they have found evidence of self-doubt on board a tour bus used by pop singer Justin Bieber. The discovery of the Class A ennui had left officers … Continue reading

April 29, 2013 · 1 Comment

Reformation (play script)

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