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Boris pledges Syrians extra NHS funding


The Foreign Secretary made a series unsubstantiated promises to end the conflict in Syria – having already delivered so successfully on Brexit, homelessness in London and keeping his ‘Little Johnson’ … Continue reading

October 18, 2016 · Leave a comment

How to get that Russian-Ultra beach body.


  Ever wondered how Moscow’s finest hooligans look so ripped, as they rip through the opposition?  Ever wanted a tear-gas inspired six-pack without the tears?  Here are our ten easy … Continue reading

June 21, 2016 · Leave a comment

Ukraine crisis is ‘Peace Avoidance’ not ‘Peace Evasion’ 


In a move set to reassure Europe, Russian officials have rebranded their support of the Ukraine Rebels as tax deductible. Taking inspiration from the shifting ethics of the British banking sector, … Continue reading

February 17, 2015 · Leave a comment

Poland braced for a massive invasion of déjà vu


As Russia reduces gas exports to Poland by 45%, officials in Warsaw have begun contingency plans for the inevitable attack by Vladimir Putin’s troops. ‘It’s only a matter of time,’ … Continue reading

September 24, 2014 · 3 Comments

Russia phones National Bullying Helpline


In the weepy small hours of the weekend, the peoples of the Russian Federation jammed phone lines with complaints of harassment and online bullying by members of the UN. In … Continue reading

July 31, 2014 · 2 Comments

Georgia & Moldova sign agreement to be the next two countries invaded by Russia


By binding themselves economically and politically with the European Union and the Ukraine (- or ‘Greater Russia’ as it is soon to be called), both eastern European nations have elected … Continue reading

July 8, 2014 · 4 Comments

Russia tries to secure Ukraine’s Eurovision vote


The Kremlin’s substantial military might is now focused on ‘gerrymandering’ the prestigious, ‘pan-sexual’ music competition by coercing other nations who have consistently qualified for Eurovision. Top of their list for … Continue reading

March 5, 2014 · Leave a comment

Russia endorses Sauron


The UK Foreign Office has advised all members of the Fellowship of the Ring to avoid visiting the land of Rudolf Nureyev. There are fears that the country’s toughening laws … Continue reading

December 16, 2013 · Leave a comment

“Homosexuality smuggled into Russia inside Kiev Cakes”


Moscow has banned imports from the Ukraine’s main confectionary makers, Roshen, claiming that there were trace elements of ‘glee and delight’ in their buttercream-like filling. Russian homophobia has been particular … Continue reading

August 16, 2013 · Leave a comment

Reformation (play script)

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